Pillars of Sanctuary
by Marisa Serise
Summary: Is Kouga anything without Muramasa? Maybe. Either way, you can't blame a zanpaktou spirit for trying to offer comfort to his wayward master. Part of the 'Pillars' series, companion story is M for mature content, this is the 'light' side of the story
1. Chapter 1

**Pillars of Sanctuary, a KougaxMuramasa fic**

**Bleach is not mine. Seriously. **

**A/N: Yaoi, does not synch up completely with filler anime arc. There's the obvious manxman thing going here, but the theme is more friendship, warmth, and hurt/comfort. **

**Update: I've decided to create a mini-universe / series for this. You're looking at 'Pillars of Sanctuary', which will cover Kouga-Muramasa friendship. It's accompanied by 'Pillars of Decadence', which is the more mature progression of the relationship. If you aren't into lemons, stay with PoS (this one) - they are interlinked but will be summarized if you don't want one or the other so you don't lose the storyline. If there is one. LOL.  
**

* * *

For a zanpaktou spirit that literally lived to control other spirits, Muramasa was surprisingly submissive. First, there was the complete submission to his instincts, the ones that told him that in the great zanpaktou pecking order, he was at the top — wasn't that why Soul Society feared him so?

Then there was the deep devotion he had to Kouga. Whenever he summoned Muramasa, the spirit would break free of the inner world and come into the real world. Those were his favorite moments — it gave him the freedom to kill, to strike down Kouga's enemies. His enemies. They were one and the same — anything that caused Kouga pain was something that needed to be eliminated.

So when Kouga stepped inside the inner world, seething with rage after dispatching those rogue shinigami and being scolded for having such extraordinary power, Muramasa knew what was required.

Those lonely pillars stood all around them, with the water floating along peacefully. Muramasa tried to offer a small smile to his master. "Kouga...your heart."

"...Is filled with nothing but anger for them. How can they do that to me? How can they...after all I have given up...after everything I have done for them..." His voice started out strong and cracked later.

Muramasa faded away and reappeared onto the wide pillar Kouga was standing on. He widened it and offered Kouga a place to rest. Kouga complied, slightly confused by the whispering spirit. When Muramasa sat on the other edge and pulled Kouga to lay against him as a makeshift bed, Kouga whispered quietly, carefully: "What are you doing, Muramasa?"

A light drag of the hand with its long claw-like nails was the only indication Muramasa had heard him. "Maybe you need to understand more about the nature between a Shinigami and their zanpaktou. I am perpetually devoted to you, Kouga. Anything you need...I will provide it for you if it is in my power to do so." The clawed-hand grazed Kouga's face for a moment.

Arms that could only reach out in this world cradled Kouga to him, and ears that picked up the stresses of the heart caught the silent tears that pride wouldn't let come out. "I can't. I hate this. I hate the way they're treating me!"

Muramasa gently traced the kenseikan in Kouga's hair, listening quietly. "Kouga, you are beautiful, strong, and your eyes see much. Your fighting skills make you the envy of Soul Society. I worry they will attempt to take you from me."

Kouga raised an eyebrow at the way Muramasa was touching him. Gently, carefully — it aggravated a part of him that didn't want to admit he could use the comfort.

"I don't need you to console me. I don't need anyone." the words felt hollow and Kouga sighed. "I..."

Muramasa shrugged. "Don't worry about it. It's okay. I understand."

As time passed in the inner world, Kouga became less aggravated and more comforted by the embrace his zanpaktou spirit offered so freely.

Muramasa simply continued to loyally hold him close, happy to be useful. He reflected on his release command — whisper. Could he whisper anything that would bring Kouga out of this depression and anger?

"Kouga."

The man looked up at the manifestation of the powerful blade. "What? What is it?"

Muramasa stroked his hair gently. "Is there anything I can do for you?"

Kouga thought long and hard for a moment — in the inner world, he could do anything, have anything. He trusted that much. But could he really ask for more right now? He would take things slowly.

He brought his face close to Muramasa's for a moment, taking in the thick brownish purple lines around the spirit's eyes. He cupped that face gently and kissed him carefully on the lips, trying to leave out as much passion as he could. One step at a time.

Muramasa reacted as expected, closing his eyes and letting a slight smile play on his face. The clawed fingers teased Kouga's arms and his then his back, exploring.

Kouga stepped back, breaking the kiss. "We can start there. That was...nice. I wasn't rejected."

Muramasa held onto Kouga and closed his eyes, knowing their time in this world was going to be cut short soon. Kouga couldn't afford to be lost in his thoughts for long, not with so many plotting against him.

"I will never reject you, Kouga. _Never_."

It was a simple sentence, but it brought Kouga a little peace, if only for the moment.

—-

**A/N: The end? I'm not sure yet — I wrote this as a quickwrite because I couldn't sleep, and I just watched eps 250 & 251 again. Yes, it veers off from the filler eps a bit, considering the events in 251 (poor Mura!)**

** I was challenged to write fluff - this is as fluff as a cat/mouse writer is gonna get, I think. And of course, it morphed into a series. Meh. I knew that was going to happen - I'm incapable of writing oneshots.  
**

**I decided to divide this series in half - you're looking at the friendship side. If you want more of the lemon/relationshippy stuff, you'll want 'Pillars of Decadence'. Just click my name and check it out if you like. **

**If you want to dig more into my brain, you will want to hit up my LJ - marisaserise . livejournal . com - feel free to add me as a friend. :) Yes, I am a self promoting machine - you didn't know? *winks* I AM a marketer for a living, you know...  
**


	2. Chapter 2

**Pillars of Sanctuary, a KougaxMuramasa fic**

**Disclaimer: Bleach is not mine. **

**Quick note: **

**Warnings: light yaoi, het, battle scene (non-graphic), implied sexual themes throughout but nothing explicit. Trying to keep it T when I'm so used to M. My my my. :) **

**Italics denote flashbacks both in dialogue as well as pieces from other scenes. Mostly this will refer to previous events in 'Sanctuary' but the events of 'Decadence' have already been assumed to have taken place. Make sense? I hope so, hehe. **

**Chapter 2 of 'Decadence' will be up soon - I'm writing 'Sanctuary' first and then keeping the mature side over to 'Decadence'. I'll try to make sure the two flow into each other OK. **

* * *

_"I will never reject you, Kouga. Never." _

Even now that he was back in his world, surrounded by so many people who idolized him, it was those words that he held onto most. They were the most sincere; he could not trust the honeyed words that poured out of these people anymore. Not when he could cook, cut, and serve their fear up to feed half of even the lowest district in Rukongai. He didn't care for that fear — why fear a man so dedicated to keeping Soul Society peaceful? He wanted to use his power to do good things in the world, yet the taunts and cold stares were beginning to bother him.

He couldn't escape the pressure that the kenseikan brought to the equation either. Not only could the world place him on a pedestal to mock and insult, he had to bear it because he was a Kuchiki. A Kuchiki man had to lock his instincts away for the good of the clan, for the good of the society, and some would argue for the good of his own self.

_"Follow your instincts, Kouga..." _

Is that what his true path was constructed from? Instincts?

_Arms that were made by design to hold and comfort him, on a lonely pillar with the water being held at bay by the unseen..._

He was walking back through Sereitei to the Kuchiki mansion, dutifully nodding his head as he heard the obligatory greetings each passerby gave almost automatically. The favored son in law of the Kuchiki house, being dusted and placed on a pedestal he despised.

_Why should I be up here alone, when my greatest desire is to be among the living? Why won't they accept that? _

It was a rest period, since he was finished with his duties to the division. He would go see his lovely wife and try to gain some sort of control over his thoughts. That was the only thing he could do. A nice dinner and a walk through the garden, perhaps.

He needed to get away from these clothes though. The shikausho was beginning to feel like a customized, well fitting prison. The draped fabric gave the illusion of space and freedom that he was all too aware that he did not have.

Of course, he could skip this and go back into his inner world, a land of pillars and sky blue eyes and claws and ...

_No._

He wasn't ready for such a thing yet. He knew he would be speaking to Muramasa again, but he needed to think and process everything that happened.

_Brownish purple yukata, that matched rings around sky blue eyes that went on forever..._

_Kami help me_, he thought as he slipped into a side entrance of one of the smaller houses that was connected to the main house. He wanted to change his clothes and bathe on his own without coming into contact with any of the servants or anyone else that would wonder why his eyes seemed to reflect the cloudiness of mist and storm.

* * *

_"Maybe you don't understand the relationship between a shinigami and their zanpaktou." _

Those were his words, but they sounded harsher in his memories than when he said them. Kouga had a lot to learn about trusting him, and even more about trusting himself. There wasn't a whole lot of time to do it in, either — Muramasa was afraid they would follow through on their silent threat to separate the two.

From the safety of Kouga's inner world, he knew the look of fear and surprise on the faces of the fallen soldiers as they watched their most prized weapon turn against them with ease. The pride of a job well done protecting his master filled Muramasa with pride.

He thought about the inner conflict Kouga had towards letting him be comforted by his own zanpaktou spirit, which left him feeling a touch annoyed. What was all the power in the world if he couldn't use it to comfort, console, and guide Kouga along to his true path? His master shouldn't fear those that couldn't see such a fine asset to their cause.

There were no words for these cowardly shinigami. Perhaps they could have a stronger zanpaktou if they spent the same amount of time Kouga had in shaping and extension of his soul. Whether it was a natural thing or no, Muramasa was one hundred percent part of Kouga and he preferred it that way.

He promised himself that he would do anything to protect Kouga, even if that meant losing the long years of life that awaited a zanpaktou spirit.

Rage flared in his heart the more he thought of those shinigami and their stinging words to Kouga. His strong, beautiful master and that tired, cracking voice wondering why they would never accept him. Of course, he wished that his master could move forward and just embrace the future, a future he was all too willing to help Kouga accomplish no matter the cost.

He curled his clawed fingers back onto themselves, a calming exercise he developed early on to keep from unbalancing Kouga's inner world. He looked down and saw the water still peacefully lapping against the solid pillars and he wondered at times if he would drown. It felt that way.

No, he would keep that from happening — the loss of Kouga's good mood, that is. He thought fondly on the first time Kouga learned not only his true name, but the word that would unleash his power unto the world.

_Whisper, Muramasa. _

A smile touched his lips for a moment before it faded and he uncurled his hand slowly, letting the nail extend to its full length. There were times he needed to whisper. With Kouga on the battlefield, striking down his enemies. With Kouga in the inner world, holding him close and watching apple green eyes grow ripe with calmness and peace.

As he called in the blade, he realized that now was not a time he desired to whisper. As he watched the familiar portal appear in his mind, he realized that it was finally the time to do a great deal more than whisper.

For once, Muramasa would _roar_.

* * *

It was time instead of words that really taught Kouga everything he knew about his wife. He knew through her quiet smiles and looks of longing that she enjoyed when he dressed up, instead of being in his uniform all the time. She liked it when they dined privately so he could let his hair run free and wild without his kenseikan in the way. These were not things a noblewoman would admit out loud, but it made discovering them quite the pleasure.

So there he was, in a dark blue silk kimono, with silvery cranes decorating the sleeves and the back. It was far fancier than what he generally preferred, but he knew she would enjoy it. He could step outside himself and make someone else happy, if only for a little while. The collar of the accompanying robe was a light gray with tiny red swirls that only hinted at the more ornate swirl pattern underneath.

The obi was a simple solid gray color, matching the collar of the under robe to best advantage. He had let his hair down as well, unbraiding the red ponytail after releasing it from the kenseikan. Is a prison less of a prison if it's distinguished and sought after? Maybe for some, but not for Kouga.

He dismissed his musings and turned to walk into the back wing of the house where he knew his wife was waiting. He had sent over a messenger to alert her to his invitation for dinner, and after having lived with her for a while, he knew very well that she would want to dine privately as much as he did.

He smiled a genuine smile and fiddled with the silver guards on his wrists, the dark blue pattern reminding him of the shadow of the cranes that decorated the kimono he wore so close to his body. Elusive and all too often, far more temporary than most understood. Such was the way of things.

* * *

Agreements among the zanpaktou spirits were common. However, Muramasa doubted that they were as detailed and planned as the ones he had with the woman he was standing in front of. Long robes covered most of her body and hung in a way that made discovering her true dimensions difficult. That was not her purpose anyway, as far as Muramasa was concerned. His temper was making his normal whisper moments difficult.

Her eyes narrowed on the sight of him and she turned away slightly, her purple-silver hair hanging in loose curls around her face. Her brown eyes blazed with rage for the intrusion into her world.

The wide valleys and beautiful slopes of this inner world made Muramasa a little envious. He admired the beauty of the trees that dotted the landscape, as well as the crisp white clouds that looked so comfortable and inviting that they could be portable bedrooms for the soul itself.

He wondered if Kouga would sleep peacefully on such a thing. Ah, Kouga.

_Kouga. _

Sky blue eyes narrowed to thin slits as Muramasa remembered why he had floated into this inner world in the first place. The woman was one he had already conquered a while back, but had kept in his small circle for one reason: she was willing to go all out in a fight against him to rein in his temper. He couldn't serve Kouga properly if his mind wasn't clear and focused on the road ahead. So when he felt like he was sliding out of that control, he followed an invisible line they had set up to be able to enter her world anytime he needed to.

The permissions were not necessary — but after the first time he had torn into this inner world, he felt they were a kind option that should be offered. There was no real requirement to be kind — he could have found the shinigami she served and plunged into this inner world all the time. However, it suited his purposes better to give her a sliver of control here and there — she was more likely to respond to him when she felt he respected her world anyway.

He manifested a cluster of blood red wildflowers, scattering them around the valley a few moments before finding the words to speak. It was part of their code — red wildflowers meant he needed to fight at his best, that he needed to squelch all the waves of his temper with an exhausting battle that would leave him tired and weary in the best way possible. After a few sessions, he had learned this was best saved for when Kouga was definitely in a resting pattern. He could push himself past this stage if Kouga truly needed his strength, but these moments were rare by design.

There were other codes as well. Blue wildflowers meant peace and companionship, times when he needed to speak freely about whatever was on his mind. It could range from one of the zanpaktou he had under his spell attempting to rebel, or even the struggles he was having with Kouga.

The woman had a few codes of her own, he noticed. Today she was holding a cluster of purple wildflowers mixed in with an equal amount of red ones. "I see we're eye to eye on the battle part, but I'm a touch disappointed you never carry a set of these when you come here." She waved the purple clusters a few times before letting them fall freely from her fingers.

Muramasa waved one of his hands slowly across the scene before him, before curling his index finger back toward his wrist, a simple sign of understanding. "I'm surprised you want such an illusion, Rosen Saira."

She smiled in return. "It would be nice to see you display a wider range of ...what do you call it, instincts?" The voice was playful now, even though her grip on her sword was far from it. She knew as well he did the meaning of those flowers, their red tint a living testament to battle itself.

His speed was impressive, but her agility was its perfect complement even with the heavy robes she wore. She backed up, moving her hand to her blade. "No release, my whispering friend?"

He chuckled, charging again, following the steps of a dance they had performed many times along the sloping land of this valley. The trees were the tall witnesses to their battle, of Saira's robes that twirled with the wind as she lunged fiercely at the man with the long white coat and purplish-brown circles around his eyes.

She pressed him back with a burst of her spiritual pressure, treating herself a small smug smile. She knew that he wouldn't use his release because it took the fun out of it for him — his focus was the challenge of defending against all of her attacks with just his sealed blade, rather than invoking the more exotic end of his skill sets. She did not have this problem at all, willing to rely on her skills to defeat this man. The smug way he curled his fingers one by one while watching her made her resolve to always do her best to defeat him, even if it was a goal that seemed to hover so far out of reach for her most of the time.

"Adjust." The calling of her own name was unnecessary here in the land of valleys and wildflowers, but the memory of her mistress's sweet voice saying the full command soothed Saira greatly. Her blade transformed into a pair of twin steel staves, with a blunt end on one side and a sharp end on the other. It was as long as the blade that Muramasa carried, and colored a deep purple like the wildflowers that she had scattered only moments before.

She copied his disappearing trick, reappearing right behind him with one staff raised up high, and the other raised low. For once, it was a move that Muramasa didn't anticipate fully, blocking the lower staff with his foot and the other one with his blade. However, he failed to account for the power of her booted foot crashing into his middle, knocking him off his feet.

He flew backward, hitting the tall grass with a groan. His temper began to shift, the battle beginning to heat up enough to make things look very interesting.

That smug smile Saira despised so much was back on his face and he curled his free hand toward her. "Interesting. Your shikai never fails to intrigue me, Rosen Saira. Perhaps I will indulge a certain princess with answering those purple flowers ...if you can get me to yield."

He got up quickly and flicked his hand outward to let the wind catch his intention for victory better than his words ever could. The need to _roar_, to let swords clash and blood sing was boiling in him. If the rose princess survived, he thought to himself, he would treat her to a little decadence. Only a little — there was too much left to resolve with Kouga for him to enjoy much.

The wind picked up a handful of red and purple flowers and made them dance on air, a sign Muramasa took as being in the right place at the right time. How related they were, battle and passion.

For now, he would have battle. Passion, like pleasure, would have to wait for a later moment.

* * *

It was a running joke among his subordinates that a Kuchiki man would perform extra training duty for sneezing, a testament to the deep devotion to self-control and resolve at all times. As Kouga rested against the cushions with his wife in his arms, he was inclined to agree, if ever so slightly.

The troubles of Soul Society had always kept them rather distant — this was a marriage that was more of mutual benefits than love. He had grown to care dearly for his wife, sharing her love of poetry, literature, art and tea. He teased her playfully in these private moments about her "second love", giving the teacup and its warm contents a playful glare.

It was a rare moment that he could be playful, where he could just enjoy the moments he had rather than having to calculate and plot and be so very careful of everything around him. There were far too many jealous of the 3rd seat position and he needed to make sure that he was able to come back home in one piece.

There would be a time for seriousness — too much time. The world of the nobles seemed to call for seriousness at every turn, so it made these moments even more special.

"You are troubled?" A question from his wife that was more statement than question, considering that she didn't seem to be looking for an answer. Her soft hands played with his hair and traced the lines of his jaw, admiring the strong lines.

A simple nod on his part, a sweep of her soft fingers on hers.

"It is getting late. You should come to bed." Her fingers trailed down his chest, tapping out an invitation the noblewoman wouldn't speak out loud at all. He admired her quiet nature and shyness, even though they had been married for a little while now. He helped her to her feet, pulling her close.

The grayish-lavender colored eyes stared into his apple green ones pleasantly enough, but as they walked hand in hand back to their private bedroom suite, Kouga couldn't help but wish he was staring into endless sky blues instead.

—-

**AN: Whew. I'm going to cap this off for now — there's more to it but I had to leave room to interconnect it back to 'Decadence'. As the story gets longer, you'll see the scenes segue (hopefully!) smoothly between Muramasa and Kouga. Kouga is in the outer world right now at rest, while Muramasa is wandering around the greater zanpaktou world. There's going to be a few original zanpaktou obviously, because we don't have enough knowledge of this fillerverse to have any fillernon zan's involved. My precious Kyouka Suigetsu isn't born yet. *cries* **

**I did my best with the description of Kouga's clothing in the real world scene — it's really hard to describe these complex kimono things. This story would have been written faster if I didn't have to hit up so many sites for them. I'm picky about plausibility for most things — I couldn't think of what to serve in a noble house, so that scene takes place after they've eaten and the servants have done their thing. If I go back and gain some muse insight with that scene, I'll add to it. I'm trying to keep each scene a little choppy, a little interconnected - we are walking down a certain road. :) **

**It's starting to become less quickwrite fodder and more of a planned out plot. I've actually storyboarded out part of it on my big office whiteboard. It's still so much fun to write. **

**Anyway - a feedback point I received is that I need to flesh out these stories a little more. So I did - this is set up for the other chapters to come. **

**Some of the flashbacks are from 'Decadence' - the sky blue / apple green extended concept is one of those points. **

**I'm trying to balance between lengthy chaps and choppy ones - the first chap was roughly ...eh, 800 words...whereas this is nearly 3,000 (aside from my lengthy author note fangirling moments). Since this is primarily yaoi for KougaxMuramasa, Kouga's wife is mainly a sympathetic character. **

**Saira Rosen is a zanpaktou spirit of an unnamed female shinigami - she isn't on Muramasa's level as her shinigami owner is more along the lines of a 7th seat. I'll continue to flesh that part out as we go along. I haven't decided if there will be a MuramasaxSaira lemon of sorts - considering I'm the infamous cat & mouse lemon duchess, there will be something. Given Muramasa's 'whisper' abilities, it will be something interesting :) *has a few ideas* Don't worry - Muramasa isn't done with Kouga in the slightest, but I felt it best for them to have time away from each other. You guys wanted a series so I'm trying to keep things moving. I'm going to rest a while and come back with 'Decadence', because I know you cute little pervies need your dose of lemon goodness too. I *can* make a KougaxWifey scene - which would be me practicing my het skills. Yaoi has melted my brain - I started out writing het original erotica before fanfiction consumed my brain. Seriously - I couldn't wait to get time to write fanfic. **

**I haven't decided if I will close the story off the whole Sealed Kouga Sandwich thing - if I do, I have another hook for it... I won't give it away. Let's just say this: remember that I'm a Team Evil fangirl. *smirks wickedly* **

**I am deeply honored by the number of alerts for this story - it's so experimental and outside of my comfort zone. I am a solid Team Evil fangirl all the way, and I don't know enough about this story to really get things going. I'll do my best to write something decent. **

**Wow. Long author's note is long - I'll try to switch it up for this story - long notes at the bottom, shorter notes at the top. By the way, I couldn't think of a proper Japanese name - so Saira Rosen will have to do. We'll see where things go. **

***bows* Later darlings! **


	3. Chapter 3

**Pillars of Sanctuary, a KougaxMuramasa fic**

**Disclaimer: Bleach is not mine.**

**Warnings: Nothing explicit – implied previous sex scenes, light yaoi, light het. Since this is the friendship/light romance side, it is comfortably T. There is some angst/conflict later here.**

**AN: Italics are past scenes/quotes or thoughts. The story should give enough context as to when it's one or the other.**

**I appreciate all of your alerts, comments, and the reviews I've received both publicly and privately. I'm encouraged to write more of this series**

**Storytime.**

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He didn't blame her for being angry. If he could place himself in her shoes for a moment, he imagined that he would feel upset too. Yet he was not in her shoes. He was Muramasa, the zanpaktou spirit that was completely owned by Kuchiki Kouga. He had lent his power to the young man a long time ago, and it was obvious that there was no turning back. So when he was summoned, he left the Spanish spirit hanging high and dry -- almost literally, until he remembered to cut her down from those bindings.

He had appeared in her inner world with a cluster of white wildflowers, with a few other colors hidden within them. Rosen Saira was a temperamental spirit and while he knew he was in for a tongue lashing, he hoped she would eventually understand.

They were so different -- he completely thought of his master day and night, thinking of ways to help him become stronger in every way. The princess on the other hand seemed to only think about herself and her desires. She spoke rarely of the shinigami she was controlled by, and when he spoke politely of her mistress she gave a snort of disdain.

_"Not all of us are in love with our shinigami like you, Mura-chan." _

He remembered her mocking, teasing tones and the bright flicker of fire in those dark brown eyes. He closed his eyes for a moment, the purple flare of his reiatsu signaling he was here in this forsaken valley yet again.

She appeared behind him, her blade at his back. She snarled softly, letting him feel every wave of frustration and irritation she had.

He simply turned, watching her with a calm eye. He held the flowers out to her, making sure to keep the other colors hidden.

"Why should I even accept those from you? Shouldn't you be giving flowers to your first love, Muramasa?" The way the words fell from her lips like ice, he almost missed his more familiar nickname, as irritating as it was.

"You knew the terms when I first came here. It is not my concern that you now wish to change them." he replied, still keeping the flowers held out to her.

"You're …gods, you're so infuriating." She paused, studying the flowers carefully. "You're hiding something else in there. I can tell." She sounded curious, her voice growing softer and a little more excited.

She carefully took the flowers from him, and scattered them on the ground to see what was hiding within. As her eyes watched the cascade of color, she took in a sharp gasp.

The outer ring of white flowers gave way to a beautiful cluster of pale pinks, lilacs, lavenders, and deep blues. She translated their code quickly as she watched each color fall to the ground. She started with the deep blues, the apology that her stoic and serious friend could not utter in words. She continued upward to the lilacs, which indicated that he did feel some sort of passion for her, even if it was not as deep as hers. The lavender was a peaceful accent to the apology, with hope that she would accept.

The pale pink stopped her in her tracks. He was saying to her in the language of flowers and ritual that he cared. It would never be as deeply as he cared for the green eyed shinigami, but the whispering, controlling man cared for her and wanted to make things right.

She mused on how much courage it took him to come back here after he disappeared so quickly, cutting her down and cleaning his hands almost as an afterthought.

His deep voice broke through her thoughts, the words curling around her like fine smoke. "I won't apologize for answering my master's call. I will apologize though, for the pain I caused before."

Saira raised an eyebrow to watch him carefully. "Before? You mean when you used your power to hold me in place, and then turned my inner world against me? Is that the before you mean?"

Muramasa winced visibly. "You pushed me. Are you displeased with the outcome."

She moved closer to him, brushing his hair back with her hand. "Far from it. If anything, I'm frustrated…we had to stop."

He smiled slightly, nodding. "It was a necessary though. You know that."

They were sitting in the grass, on a blanket to protect their clothes more than anything else. Saira was a big fan of the long white coat with the purple accents that Muramasa was always in. He noticed that her clothes changed from time to time, and wondered if it was simply a whim or something more.

She leaned against him quietly. "I am concerned for you and your Kouga, Muramasa. They are…"

He held up a clawed hand. "I know. I can see the events of his outer world. When he is troubled…my world changes."

Thoughts of water rising and crashing over pillars, drowning him filled him with a slight fear. "I feel like there's something off with him. I'm trying to keep him happy."

There was a slight underlying meaning to the words that made Saira smirk. "Putting your skills to good use? Misoka-chan would be proud."

He remembered the curly-haired spirit that belonged to another shinigami Kouga had been training with at the time. He had first explored these odd sensations and emotions with her, given that she was the better player at them. Once he had learned more about the world of the zanpaktou, he had ended up parting ways from her. It was something he felt was necessary at the time, yet he found himself wondering if he could go back to her someday.

"You live to tease me, Saira." The reply was delivered in an equally teasing manner, as his arm wrapped around her tightly.

She savored the feeling and sighed. "I wish sometimes there was room in your heart for more than one person. You will never feel any love for anyone but Kouga."

"Is that what you would call this?"

The question was asked in all seriousness, though Saira almost wondered if he was taunting her. "Yes. You love him. I cannot believe that such a thing would not be clear to you. That's why I am so concerned for you. Given enough time, I think he'll realize he loves you too."

"That is not possible." Muramasa sounded stern, his eyes studying the woman he held close to him. He continued, sweeping his nails lightly over her cheek and neck. "He does not see me that way. I am a tool for him to carry out his mission as a shinigami and an outlet for his frustration. Nothing more."

Saira's laughter at those words began to fill him with a sharp anger until she clapped her hands together. "I laugh only because it sounds so absurd. He comes into his inner world looking for you as his sanctuary, my dear. That is not a man who only sees you as a tool. You really need more friends, Mura-chan."

Ah, that nickname was going to be the death of him.

She went quiet for a moment and he felt her energy shift into a more serious form. "Speaking of your master, where is he? Won't you have to go soon?"

He nodded. "He is off to see Kuchiki Ginrei. I wanted to give them privacy." Saira caught the undercurrent of disgust in Muramasa's voice at the mention of the leader of the Kuchiki family. She had heard the backstory on that several times, and each time left her with a clear picture of the rage that lay hidden in Muramasa's heart. More reason why she worried -- one day that rage would break open and then…

No, she would do what she could to comfort him. Even if that led back to that crippling helplessness, that invisible wave holding her in place while sky blue eyes glowed with a chilling determination that terrified and excited her at the same time.

She snuggled closer to him and nodded. "I see. What are you going to do now?"

He smiled for her, admiring the woman's courage. He spent most of his time plotting and calculating, much like Kuchiki Kouga. So he knew that this woman was aware of the full range of emotions he carried. There was a fear of hers that had manifested from the other day. He wanted to address that before anything else.

He brought white wildflowers to fall on her beautiful tanned skin, studying the bright flowers against the dark reds and blues of her robes. He continued to hold her tight, making sure his long nails didn't scratch her in the process. "Well, there's a certain friend of mine that needs me right now. Barring being summoned, I think it might be a good moment to cycle through these flowers, hmm? If you've accepted this one, perhaps we can explore the next one after that." His free hand pointed at the deep blue cluster first before lightly gesturing towards the light purple cluster.

Saira looked up at him, really stared into those mysterious eyes of his. "You exist with the power to completely control other zanpaktou. Yet…you seem to express regret over that."

He shrugged. "Regret? I shouldn't have used my power to hold you in place like that without telling you. You were filled with a fear that I did not want."

A fear that he did not want? Chills crept up her spine at how those words could be taken. There was the surface meaning -- a reminder that he could do anything once he controlled another spirit. Yet the underlying meaning that curled around her and enticed her was more seductive: he could place any feeling into anything he desired. That type of subtle power was enticing, had a scent that filled her nostrils everytime she heard the sound of those pointed boots rustling around in this wide valley.

She gave him a bright smile and just rested against him, bringing up a cluster of white wildflowers that had intertwined with the deep blue ones just offered moments before. She laid them in her lap and placed their hands there. "Let's start with these white ones. Right now, I think that would be the best for both of us."

For once, Muramasa was able to relax. He had the power to invade the inner worlds of zanpaktou, but he realized that the dark eyed woman in his arms was demonstrating her power to invade hearts with remarkably accuracy. Yes, they would start with calmness and friendship. If she could help him protect Kouga, then he would take care of her too.

* * *

No one had asked him about his night, and after the time he had with Muramasa, he was rather glad for that. It would have been hard to explain why he felt so electric and alive again. It was freedom without truly being free, but years of dealing with his new noble relatives had taught him to take freedom -- even little broken shards of it -- wherever he could.

_"Fall off the cliff with me, Kouga…"_

He shivered, remembering the way that deep voice had murmured over his entire body with so much passion, devotion, and care. When did Muramasa start feeling so strongly for him?

He made his way to the Sixth Division, thinking back to the first time he heard Muramasa's voice. He was still just a boy, but he had heard that whisper so clearly.

_What will you do with power, Kouga? Can you control it if you have it? _

He thought he had been dreaming of it until he began to see it everywhere -- the shadow of two sky blue eyes watching him. It was a stare that seemed to bore into his soul. He had lashed out, trying to figure out who was taunting him. This seemed to please the spirit at the time.

_So much fire, young one. When you learn my name, we will speak again. _

It took him forever to hear it - to know the name of his zanpaktou. He was meditating one day and fell into a slow, deep rhythm, his breathing perfectly controlled. His stillness took him to a battlefield that was not his, to the sound of swords clashing, almost crying out for bloodshed. It startled him, but he did not back away from the vision.

That's when he heard the name ghost over his mind's ear, curling around him like it had been there all along.

_Muramasa. _

The release command came as a guess -- once he called the spirit by name, he tried to figure out how to unlock the power that felt so close to him and yet so far away. He learned from Nakamura-sensei that one could get the answers to many things by simply looking at past actions, statements, and gestures.

The fact that this spirit of his decided to whisper to him all the time made him eventually figure it out. The joy he had of pointing his zanpaktou at the ground and calling Muramasa's power into the blade for the first time was amazing.

_Whisper, Muramasa._ The then-unfamiliar purple light had filled the blade from top to bottom, vibrating softly in his hand.

_I knew you would figure it out eventually. Well done…Kouga._

He found his way in the present to the Sixth Division Captain's office, knocking gently at the door.

The gruff voice from inside commanded him to enter, and he followed through with the command, entering the room on his knees. "Good morning, Ginrei-dono."

"Kouga."

He was glad the older man's back was to him; otherwise he would have seen Kouga flinch. He could offer his son-in-law the precious kenseikan that was looped through his hair, could present his daughter as a worthy bride, even open up the large manor for their living quarters. Yet the one thing he desired -- acceptance…ah, that he could not give Kouga at all. He had to hope and pray for mere scraps of recognition thrown from the table of a man who never seemed to care at all.

"I was told to come see you; your daughter said you had an important message for me." He said all of this in a rush, remembering the envelope that was left for him when he opened the tiny mailbox next to the doorstep of that solitary set of rooms he occupied when he needed to think.

"Indeed. Kouga…I have been informed by the soutaichou that you will be sent to Hueco Mundo for a long term assignment." Ginrei did not change from his normal serious voice, or give any hint that he would miss his son-in-law. Such feelings were not expected from the man, so Kouga did not hurt too much when he did not feel anything returned.

"Hueco Mundo, Ginrei-dono? But…why?" he asked, truly shocked. He had just finished a major mission to wipe out insurgents both in Sereitei and in Rukongai where the rebels were hiding. He had been filled up to the brim with compliments, commendations, and accolades for his efforts. Why was he being hidden away like a child in timeout?

"It isn't obvious to you, Kouga? Tsch." The sound of disdain was deafening. Ginrei's icy words were covering Kouga from head to toe and it was beginning to make the room spin.

The older man continued his lecture without missing a beat. "The higher-ups are well aware of your power, Kouga. It is like nothing else in Sereitei. It is either they put you away for a while, or they will have to resort to other methods."

"Did you say anything to the soutaichou?" A hopeful question, with apple green eyes daring to hope, to dream that his father-in-law did remember they were still family.

"I suggested it. You are still a Kuchiki, you know. I did not want them to imprison you here -- that would bring too much shame to our family name."

The easy, effortless way those words were said filled Kouga with rage. He held it in, his eyebrow twitching. His fists clenched but he did not rise from his position on the floor. His own father-in-law, throwing him aside like trash.

"How long do I have?" As if hope could be squelched in one question -- not a chance with the young shinigami. His second question sounded just as hopeful as the first.

"Two days. I will escort you to the portal myself. It is only proper. Pack lightly but take whatever you like. You will not be back for a while, ten years."

_Ten years. _

He shivered but tried not to show it. There was no point in arguing. There was no point in pleading. There was no point in asking why, or even asking for forgiveness for unknown crimes.

"I see. If you would excuse me…Ginrei-dono. I need to collect my thoughts and also make time to speak to my wife."

When the older man made no attempt to stop him, Kouga stood up, bowed once, and then left the room slowly, waiting until he was out of sight before letting shunpo carry him away quickly.

The world of pain greeted him as he hopped from building to building, heading for the forest around Sereitei. It was quiet there, and he could process everything going on.

It didn't take him long as he came to it. He needed to think, to meditate for a moment. Maybe several moments.

He immediately knelt down on that thin little lip of rock, trying to keep his emotions in check. He wouldn't cry - no that was out of the question. He knew in his heart that they were turning against him, that this might as well have been a death sentence. Ten years was long enough to get lost in Hueco Mundo, long enough for a Hollow or something to end his life so Soul Society wouldn't have to have his blood on their hands.

He unsheathed his zanpaktou, looking at the cold steel with wonder. Was it really just him and Muramasa against everyone? Could he really trust Muramasa to help him get stronger and be able to protect himself against them?

"_Fall with me, Kouga." _

"_Follow your instincts. "_

"_I'll teach you how to whisper." _

"_I'll never reject you, Kouga. Never. "_

He balanced the sword carefully on its tip, holding it steady as he calmed himself, practicing the same relaxation techniques that had gotten him to this point.

_Help me, Muramasa. Help me understand. _

_

* * *

  
_

White wildflowers had begun to slowly transform into light purple ones that coaxed them to a desire, a passion that was slowly building between them. Saira was still laying in Muramasa's arms, letting him drag his nails through her dark, curly ringlets. She enjoyed the way his chest rose and fell, the way he seemed so calm.

_Why do you place so much stress on yourself for your shinigami's sake? What do you possibly get out of the deal? _

His voice had a way of weaving around and through her thoughts. She didn't realize she had murmured the last question out into the air, and she heard Muramasa's quiet sigh from behind her. "I get a man I can be loyal to for the rest of my life - fulfillment, I guess is the word for it. I know you don't understand."

"I'd…like to."

Her voice wavered, and Muramasa paused to listen. Saira didn't like talking about her shinigami the way he did, didn't care to admit that the inner world she loved so much was also the dominion of someone else who could change it.

She continued softly, her voice barely audible in the greater valley around them. "I…I love the way you sound when you talk about your shinigami. I love the pride you have for him, the way you truly will do anything to protect him. Tell me, has he reached bankai?"

Muramasa hummed, lightly scratching her arm with a wandering fingernail. "Not yet. However, shikai suits him right now."

A wave of dread washed over Saira for a moment and she went still. "Muramasa, I am concerned for your shinigami. I have heard…I have heard the mistress speaking to someone close to the soutaichou. I fear that your Kouga is in great danger of being separated from you."

Muramasa pulled her head back slightly, the touch gentle even though a mix of fear and frustration began to seep out of him. "Separated from me? That can't be - they can't fear him that much!"

Saira rolled out of his grasp and onto her feet, stretching for a moment. She helped Muramasa to his feet and sighed. "It's not just Kouga they fear, Mura-chan. They're afraid of you. Of what you can do."

Muramasa flexed his clawed fingers back and forth, trying not to channel his temper into the other spirit. He needed to be calm to face Kouga.

_I cannot lose you. I cannot lose you. __**I cannot lose you**__. _

"I do not know what to say to that."

"You can invade the inner world of the zanpaktou. You can…influence us, pull us away from our shinigami, kneel at your feet and even rejoice in doing so. Soul Society will never accept that. You know this."

"Where will he go then?"

"The rumor that I heard was he is to be sent to Hueco Mundo for ten years."

_Ten years._

Muramasa clenched his teeth together, hot rage making the purple edge of his reiatsu clearly visible. Saira didn't back down; a move that surprised him. He sighed and tried to think rationally, forming a mental chessboard of what needed to be done next.

"What can I do?"

Saira toyed with a few wildflowers. "We can start with two key things. First, you must take this time to help Kouga try to achieve bankai. I may not understand your bond to your shinigami, but I know this: he is strong. He can reach bankai. Second, to protect him in case they separate you…you must begin to build a sanctuary. You must build a place in the inner world you share for him to go if the worst happens. It will allow him to wait for you to create a solution."

Saira was known for her trickery -- the rose princess had agendas of her own that Muramasa didn't always care for.

He decided to get to the point of the matter. "How can I trust you, Rosen Saira?"

She smiled and placed a light kiss to his eyelids, then his lips. She broke off the kiss before he could respond. "I have not shown you my full power. I am also going to be getting my mistress to begin to train for bankai. It will take her longer than your Kouga, but she can do it. We will help. But you must go."

Muramasa felt lost, confused, and very afraid. He watched Saira toy with the flowers and he sighed. "This was supposed to be time spent with you, Saira. I am sorry I have failed again."

The next kiss was much more intense, with Muramasa being pulled against the strange, mysterious woman. Desire radiated from her and crashed against him. She reluctantly broke off the kiss. "You haven't failed. I just failed to accept that your focus has to be on your shinigami. There's no sense in wishing for something that won't come true."

He held her tightly, and sighed. "I will try to come back when I can. When we go to Hueco Mundo…it will be too dangerous for me to come here. In the Sereitei, it's different…I…"

She shushed him. "I know what the trip to Hueco Mundo means. I know what it means for us. I know what it means for your Kouga. There is not a happy ending right now for any party involved, but if we work together, there might just be a small one. I will need you to trust me though."

She held up the coin on a string and shut her eyes. "_These rings that tie and bind hold us_ // _their circles a sign of_ _trust_ // _to connect what cannot be mended otherwise _// _my right hand is the finder, and my left hand is the seeker."_

He didn't recognize the incantation, but a dark red wave rose from Saira, flowing from her and wrapping around his left hand. The coin in her hand glowed and she opened her eyes slowly, carefully after a few moments.

"You'll be able to reach out for me. I'll be able to send you any news I pick up. I have a few spirits that may be useful later. You must go, Muramasa. Your shinigami is so distressed that even _I_ can hear him beginning to call for you."

Her words made him more afraid. He waved and faded away quickly, causing a strong wind to pick up.

Saira perched on a rock, looking down at the white wildflowers. Kouga would need friendship and sanctuary in order to move forward. She prayed that Muramasa would understand what was needed.

* * *

_Help me, Muramasa. Help me understand. _

Kouga opened his eyes and found Muramasa kneeling next to him, the wind picking up his layered brown hair and the edge of the big fur collar.

Upon realizing that he was being seen by his master, Muramasa opened his eyes and smiled.

_Sky blue eyes met apple green ones with an understanding that went beyond words. _

"What do you need to understand, Kouga?"

Kouga nodded, thinking. "How did you get here so quickly…I don't remember calling you."

Muramasa smiled. "When you're in distress…your heart calls out to me."

Kouga's eyebrow twitched. There was only so much kindness he could take -- he was a 3rd seat that had seen enough war to season his cast iron attitude thoroughly. "Tsch. You didn't have to come."

"I know where we will be going in two days."

Kouga lost any facade he planned on bringing up. How did Muramasa know that?

Muramasa continued, noting the shinigami's expression. "Yes, I know. We are going to Hueco Mundo for ten years. I know. However, we will have each other. I will take care of you. We will get stronger together."

Kouga scoffed. "I'm already strong. Don't you know that?"

His shoulders bunched together, the tension clearly visible. He watched Muramasa place his hand on his shoulder, carefully avoiding digging his long nails into the skin. "Is that not one of the first things I told you? Kouga, you are strong and beautiful. However, life is about incremental improvement, as you have heard so many times before."

Kouga tried to take the words in stride, but he was failing miserably. If his sword had no faith in him, wasn't he just like everyone else in the world? "I only have two days here and ten years stuck with you. Excuse me."

Muramasa watched him get up and walk away, unable to rise to his feet. The words were said out of frustration for the situation; the logical side of him knew that. However, the heart that was slowly opening up heard the words and sank back down, beginning to frost over.

He faded, a tiny blood-laced teardrop falling from his right eye before he disappeared.

* * *

**AN: Had to introduce more conflict :) It is hurt/comfort you know :D In order to set up the rest of the plot, I realized that these two have to experience some pain. Kouga is still young and as much as he thinks he can handle everything on his own…he's about to learn that he really can't.**

**This is clearly AU, as I am now deviating hard from the events of ep 250 & 251. Some of those events will be seen in 'Pillars', but in order to extend the storyline to cover the rest of the series, I'm taking some serious artistic license.**

**I re-read the series so far, and I made a serious error that might be confusing: the unnamed shinigami that wields Saira? She's supposed to be a 7th seat, not a 12th seat. I'm going to go back and correct that. Yikes! (Sometimes these errors sneak in after I've uploaded. It's easier for some reason to see them after the fact. Sigh.) In addition, I'm trying to make apparent weaknesses in everything going on – but I had to set up a link to Saira somehow. This will not be an easy journey for them. I'm praying Saira doesn't come out looking like a Mary Sue, which is why I try to characterize her emotions. She is not ecstatic about helping Kouga, and that's going to be apparent as time passes.**

**I do like the 'broken' love triangle that's happening between Saira-Muramasa-Kouga. It reminds me of a friendship I had a long time ago between two people. Person A and Person B couldn't stand each other, but they loved me with everything they knew how. I'm inspired by that as I write this.**

**I'm having a lot of fun writing this as you can tell. Given where we left off in 'Sanctuary', 'Decadence' probably will not be as lemony as you might be used to reading. I haven't decided yet - what do you think? I probably won't have 'Decadence' out until I finish my client projects for the day. This is so a story completely for my pleasure, but I'm so surprised it's caught the attention of so many people.**

Grateful for all of y'all, truly (yes, I say y'all. Don't stone me.)


	4. Chapter 4

**Pillars of Sanctuary, a KougaxMuramasa fic**

**Disclaimer: Bleach is not mine. **

**AN: After a long walk to think about the story, I realized that I couldn't do my usual zig-zag story stitch and jump over to 'Decadence'. The relationship needs some healin'. Peals-Of-Laughter, I know you're a sensitive soul and I gotta squeeze your heart a **_**little**_** more before you get the resolution you're looking for - *offers stuffed plushies and candy* Trust in my storytelling skillsies – I wouldn't give hurt without comfort. This chapter has both. So we are picking up **_**directly**_** after the previous chapter in 'Sanctuary'.**

**Trying to keep these notes short at the top and I'm failing miserably. We'll be in 'Sanctuary' territory for this chap, and then we'll go back to 'Decadence' to tie in a couple of things. This is pretty much Kouga and Muramasa's chapter – if you're starting to like the secondary characters, they will be back later but not right now. **

**Storytime. **

**

* * *

  
**

Given the situation, he could have run to Saira. He could have invaded another shinigami's inner world, toyed with a random zanpaktou that wouldn't mean anything. He could do these things and more to escape the water that was rising so fast up the tall pillars that made up this inner world of his. Pride wouldn't let him flee to any false sanctuary. He would rest here and wait for Kouga to come for him. There were no other options.

He made himself comfortable on the pillar, noticing it was beginning to shrink back to the original size it was.

_Oh, Kouga, you're hurting so bad. I can help you if you let me._

He tried to think about what Rosen Saira was trying to tell him. Build a sanctuary here? How could he build anything when Kouga was determined to fight alone? What did she mean by sanctuary anyway -- he thought he was providing something like safety for his shinigami.

It was _this_ inner world, with the fast rising water and the shrinking pillars that was the environment for the tears that rolled down his cheeks. He wiped them away to keep the bloody drops from ending up on his coat. He didn't want to have to clean it or even admit that he was tearing up.

He wondered idly if it was easier to be like Saira and hold the shinigami at a distance, intervening only if absolutely necessary. He did not like that idea at all, but if that's what Kouga wanted, he would do that.

_Because you love him. He just has to realize he loves you too. _

He flicked another tear away with his long nails and felt more frost curling around his heart. Saira's words made it worse, in a way that made him feel like falling off this pillar and into the turbulent water below. If he stopped to believe in the idea that he could love anybody, what did it say that he was rejected by the one person he needed the most?

The coin he used to step in and out of Saira's world shimmered in his mind, the memory of her effort to stay connected to him causing more concerns to creep into his mind. What did that odd woman want with him? He didn't need to love anyone. He needed to be strong enough to take down Kouga's enemies, his enemies. That was it.

He didn't need the cackling rose princess to know that was a lie. He wanted more than that, maybe even _needed_ more than that. There was no way that he could be content with just being a tool, no higher than a kettle or a good polishing cloth. He did not want to be just a commodity.

He hoped that Kouga would come back, hoped that they could talk. The inner world had gotten cold again and even with the yukata underneath his long white coat, Muramasa shivered.

The thought of deep blue wildflowers hiding within white ones filled him with hope. Maybe Kouga needed more assurance that he had faith in the shinigami. His shinigami. He felt tired and weary, unsure if he could really manipulate this inner world like he used to.

He strengthened his resolve, looking at his long nails. He was the other side of Kouga, an extension of that beautiful man's soul. He would figure out how to cheer him up again, and how to protect him from what lay ahead of them both. Hueco Mundo would not steal Kouga's spirit. He would do anything to keep that from happening.

For now, he made himself as comfortable as he could as the water rose up the pillars.

For Kouga's sake, he could not drown.

His last thoughts as he closed his eyes were of apple green eyes and falling flowers, and a wind that would connect him to both.

* * *

Kouga was a man of his word. He told Ginrei-dono that he was going home to check on his wife and tell her the news. He knew that she was already informed of his new assignment. There was no need to tell her but to avoid doing so would be like leaving stitches out of a garment. The garment would still function but there would always be an odd visual aberration that wouldn't go away until it was addressed appropriately.

He said a prayer for small favors -- like the ability to shunpo fast enough to avoid the stares and comments that were the persistent waves that lapped at his tired, weary shore. Today was not a day to wear special clothes. He didn't have the heart to maintain a facade that was cracked and stained anyway.

He thought about Muramasa, about the shocked look on the spirit's face. _Tsch. Damned tool._

He sighed, and corrected himself. He couldn't be angry with the only person that was trying to keep him sane through all of this. That Kuchiki pride cut both ways, and right now, pride was telling him it was stupid to go into his inner world to take care of the spirit of a sword. Besides, what would he say to Muramasa? A simple apology for the words he knew were cutting was not going to make things right.

_"Anything for you, Kouga." _

_"I will never leave you, Kouga. Never." _

Guilt and shame danced around him, boxing him in. He had run away from help because he was afraid. Ginrei-dono's announcement had made him afraid -- afraid of the future, afraid of his own power, afraid of being shut away and sealed up. Muramasa had told him that he would help him get stronger, that they would get stronger together.

His logical side was slowly beginning to push the emotional side out and present its case. He had to admit the logic side was beginning to make sense. Muramasa had opened himself up to him in a way that defied common convention. He gave and gave and gave, not caring if Kouga never gave as much as he took.

He wondered about Ginrei's words about Muramasa -- where they really afraid of the spirit he had grown to care about so much? What would they do?

Muramasa had proven he could live without Kouga, though the shinigami was not sure if he could say the same thing.

He needed to make things right -- if Muramasa would let him. Even if the spirit rejected him, he hoped they could at least go back to the friendly times they had when Kouga was younger and just learning the name of his sword. If he couldn't even have that…that's when he knew he was really in trouble.

First, he had to go speak to his wife, then he would come for Muramasa and try to make things right.

* * *

It felt like hours had passed, but Muramasa was indifferent to time. Sleep wasn't something he had a use for, so he was back to laying on pillows that still smelled faintly of Kouga.

_Let me taste those nails as I let go. _

_Why are you so good to him? _

He sighed, beginning to grow restless. He had already organized the cluster of flowers that sat next to him several times before giving up out of sheer nervousness. He admired his work one more time before laying back on the cushions. There was the standard white outer layer, with a deep inner layer of deep, dark blues to go with it. He included a deep purple but made sure it was kept light. He topped it off with a dark red for battle -- not because he wanted to subdue his shinigami master, but because he wanted to remind the shinigami he would go with him on any battlefield, anywhere.

Even to Hueco Mundo, the land of eternal night.

He sighed, trying to drown out the rushing water underneath him. He had noticed the water beginning to slow down but he still feared drowning, of fading away as wave after wave claimed every dry space available.

"I don't want to drown." He whispered sadly, closing his eyes again.

"So don't."

He immediately opened his eyes to find Kouga standing in front of him, a scowl on his face. He studied those beautiful apple green eyes he adored so much, and found sadness in them. Sadness? What was wrong now?

"Kouga…I didn't expect you."

Kouga smiled, noticing how rumpled Muramasa's hair and clothes were. He also noticed the large cluster of flowers sitting next to the spirit. "What are those?"

Muramasa returned the smile and held the bundle out to him. "You asked me a little while ago what I do with Rosen Saira. Well… when I can't think of what to say, I bring flowers. It's part of our code." He carefully watched Kouga's face as he explained, and since there was no negative response from the shinigami so far, he decided to continue.

He stood up and dug through the cluster to reveal the other colors in the bundle other than the white protective layer. "The white is for friendship, the deep blue is for apology…the red is for battle…" He trailed off, not sure how to explain the rest.

Kouga raised an eyebrow, curious as to what the purple flowers meant. "You missed one."

Muramasa nodded. "The deep purple is …passion, I guess you could say. I figure all of them like this…describe how I feel about you."

Kouga closed the distance between them, reached out to embrace Muramasa tightly. He couldn't stay angry -- did this man spend all this time thinking about how to make him feel better? How to apologize to _Kouga_ for something that wasn't even his fault?

He noticed how chilly the pale skin was, even colder than normal. "You're freezing cold…and I hear the waves more."

The spirit gave another nod before replying. "Yes…you were upset earlier and…it gets bad here when you're mad like that. Your heart is so troubled…but you coming here helps."

Kouga ran his hair through messy chocolate brown locks, trailed his fingers across a cold pale cheek. "You are the one who deserves the apology, not me." He sighed. "I'm not good at apologies. I've never really had anyone I cared enough about to apologize to."

Muramasa's eyes widened at the silent admission hiding in there. Kouga did care about him. He could waste time picking apart semantics or he could enjoy the moment. There was the small detail of being held by his master instead of the other way around. "I should be the one comforting you. I know…you don't have much time here."

Kouga brought Muramasa's lips to his, closing his eyes. The kiss was short but it was a start to returning back to where they were. Muramasa leaned against him and as he wrapped his arms tighter around the spirit, Kouga noticed how thin and pale Muramasa really was.

"Can we work this out, Muramasa? Can you forgive me?"

Muramasa chuckled. "The inner world is starting to get better. Look at the pillar - it's growing wider again."

Kouga nodded. "Maybe you need to build a house in here …so you'll have sanctuary against the storm." It was a bit of the old Kouga coming out, the man whose skills with the pen as well as the sword had attracted the noble Kuchiki family.

Muramasa blinked, but said nothing. He was slowly beginning to understand what Saira was trying to tell him. He closed his eyes tightly, hoping that she wasn't playing one of her games. Too much was at stake and he had no time to waste.

The whispering spirit sighed and stayed close to the shinigami, causing Kouga to chuckle softly. "I expected a lecture and yet…you seem okay. More than okay."

Muramasa nodded, looking at the inner world around him. He was seeing the way that the world was changing back to the peace he enjoyed during those brief times he was with Kouga before.

Kouga scooped the spirit into his arms and lowered him carefully down on the cushions. He noticed a few cushions had fallen off and were floating in the water below. He chose not to say anything in order to lower his chances of upsetting Muramasa further. He had already done enough.

"Kouga."

The voice seemed distant and faint, exhausted. "You don't have to spend your last days in Soul Society with me." The thin man was still curled up against him, and he noticed a strange sadness still radiating from him.

"I know. There's…nothing else for me to do in the outside world. I already told her. She knew and…there was nothing to say."

Kouga wasn't exaggerating. He remembered how still she looked as he told her the news. She was a noblewoman, trained to show no outward emotion about anything. He expected nothing else from a woman whose father was Kuchiki Ginrei. When life was crashing down around them, their response to the chaos was silence. At the beginning of their marriage, that silence hurt because he felt it was born out of indifference. Now he realized that the silence was generated not out of indifference, but out of respect for Kouga to make the decisions he needed to make.

They had eaten dinner together with her showing through actions how much she would miss him. He felt her hand on his, her grayish lavender eyes focused on him through every movement and action. As he spoke on the highlights of his day, she listened with deeper attention.

They were starting to understand each other, even as the words set in that he would be gone for ten years. It was a short jaunt for a shinigami, and for a noblewoman like his very Kuchiki wife, it would be over before she realized it.

He indulged her slightly, choosing to hold her until she faded into a deep sleep instead of immediately going to his little private hideout. He only took two steps into that private shelter before guilt took over again, reminding him that he needed to apologize to Muramasa and make things right the best way he knew how.

Muramasa was resting quietly, content just to be close to his shinigami. He broke the silence between them. "What do we do now, Kouga?"

Kouga sighed. "If you mean about the situation with Hueco Mundo, we go ahead and leave when the time comes. Being in Hueco Mundo will give us time to train and get ready for anything else they have up their sleeves."

The slow, even way Muramasa's nails dragged down his arm stirred him up all over again.

_"Let me taste those claws again."_

_"Teach me how to whisper."_

Kouga didn't mind the feeling, but it was hard to keep things neutral when he kept thinking about those nails and even this little flower code Muramasa mentioned earlier. He noticed how reluctant Muramasa was to mention those purple flowers -- did he no longer want that part of their dynamic?

No.

He wouldn't have included them if he wasn't attracted, but with the entire world against him, it was hard to tell who was friend or foe anymore.

He brought Muramasa's lips to his again, tasting them slowly and carefully. He closed his eyes to better get an idea of the feelings of the thin spirit. The response was equally controlled, and Kouga sensed a high level of desire swirling around them.

_Believe in yourself, and believe in me too. _

When he broke off the kiss, he could have sworn he heard a soft whimper -- not that he would call Muramasa out to admit it. If his sword was an extension of himself, then he had to expect that their reactions would be fairly similar.

Tiny pinpricks over his arms, then back up to his cheek, with his spirit's eyes following each movement to the fullest. Kouga closed his eyes, moving them to rest against the cushions next to each other. He called in a light blanket and huddled in close. "I'll need to get some rest. I don't expect you to sleep since I know you usually don't…"

"I will sleep today, Kouga. You are here. Once you fully drift off, you'll go back to the outer world. As you are out and about, I will make sure to listen very close to make sure you are okay. I will need to take care of some things before our trip."

The spirit's words soothed and surprised him. This whispering zanpaktou spirit who required no sleep would keep him company until he faded back to the real world.

If sky blue eyes had decided at that moment to meet apple green ones, they would have truly found them filled with an understanding that went beyond words.

* * *

**AN (a little long, pack a lunch!): I'm still playing around with the chapter length - this weighed in at about 2800 words. I know the last one was like a 5800 monster, but I really didn't want to go on for nearly 6,000 words about a single point. Peals-of-Laughter, I TOLD you to trust me, didn't I? :) **

**They're not the only one that was teary eyed over the Kouga / Muramasa angstfest. I left out the secondary characters (Kouga's wifey and Rosen Saira) to set the tone of the story at this point -- they are coming to a point where they will have to count on each other instead of running elsewhere for advice and comfort. **

**I was completely influenced by "The Beauty of Who You Are" by Marc Broussard for part of this story. If you haven't heard this track, it's beautifully soulful and sweet. **

**For 'Decadence' readers - do not fret! You'll see all the usual suspects up to their usual behavior - to some extent. I wrote this chapter to take place right after Ch 3 of the same story - 'Decadence' will pick up during the 'two days reprieve' arc. Kouga and Muramasa both need time in Soul Society and to have closure on their own. Lemons will probably still be yaoi and het if there are any. It'll be a good one, just give me a little time. I didn't expect to even have time to post for 'Sanctuary'. **

**This story is actually taking over 'Moonbathing' in terms of eyeballs - wow. This is a totally experimental story, whereas I know completely where my AiGin is going. KougaxMuramasa is such a strange pairing to me, but I am enjoying writing it. I am deeply honored that so many people are tuning in. **

**I can't tell you that angst moments won't happen again -- if they do, please trust in me to steer you from one emotion to the other, the way a good storyteller should. If you want to chat with me about the story at large, you can leave reviews or PMs. On my profile page is the link to my journal where I'll be backfilling and explaining a few things I couldn't put in the notes from time to time. **

**I'm still trying to write 1-2 hours of fanfic a day. Considering this has become a series, I could spend that time writing a whole chapter. It really depends on the Muse and her level of favor on me for the day -- you writers out there know what I'm talking about! **

**By the way, if you're curious about the Moonbathingverse (my 1st storyverse), it is about to come off of hiatus :) My beta is still taking care of our granny after surgery and he's promised to help me with the plot twists of that cat & mouse game. **

**Stay tuned! **


	5. Ten Years of Seclusion: Part One

**Pillars of Sanctuary, a KougaxMuramasa fic**

**Disclaimer: Bleach is not mine. Serious Business.**

**AN:This is the 'nice' side remember, where we explore the relationship itself. I skipped over the last day in Soul Society thing because really, the night before is so busy before a departure nothing really legendary happens anyway. I wanted to get them to HM, and that's where they're headed today. This will cover the 'departure' and arrival in HM.**

**Warnings: Obviously AU at this point, yaoi, malexmale kissing & embraces. That's as far as we go on the 'mild' side However, there is a mention of a non-con/rape/assault that occurred in the past in the OC scene. It is not described in graphic detail, but it's an important detail so I tried to handle it as seriously as possible without having to rely on _those_ details.**

**UPDATE: Hat tippin' over to Juno Tartini hardcore for pointing out I goofed on the first scene. I didn't realize that garganta are used by Arrancar and shinigami use senkaimon. That completely makes my first scene ...off.  
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**Update Two: It's been modified. I'm taking a little leeway to assume a private gate would be used instead of a public one. Also, the opening scene is a little bitter my sensitive souls, but I make up for it later with some warmth. (That's what I get for listening to Foo Fighters - Tired of You as I update.) Enjoy!  
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The final day in Soul Society had come quickly and left with the same speed as it arrived. There were no tearful goodbyes, and there were far too few true words of kindness given to Kouga. He knew part of it was that far too many people saw this as his comeuppance, sufficient payback for Kouga's confidence in his abilities.

_No one wants me here. The ones who still remember me fondly behaved like they were watching me go off to die. _

True to his word, Kuchiki Ginrei had walked him to the massive field on the outskirts of the mansion. He knew the decision to keep the departure private was not born out of any soft emotions his father-in-law held for him. He was a Kuchiki now, and anything less than a private send off via the exclusive senkaimon was for the common shinigami, not a noblewoman's husband.

It made him feel tired. He wasn't expecting warm hugs and bright smiles, but the man could at least look at him. The man could at least pretend that it wasn't just duty and family pride that made him personally see Kouga off for his Hueco Mundo mission. The more Kouga thought about it, the man could at least say a few kind words that were actually sincere. After all, a Kuchiki man was well-read and educated; such a man could always weave words that seemed sweeter than the finest candy, until you bit down into the center. After the sweetness dissolved from those words, you were always left with a hollow center that should have contained warmth and smoothness but he wasn't holding his breath for that series of emotions from Ginrei.

_Be calm, Kouga. This will soon pass. _

Kouga felt relieved. They had practiced speaking more to each other this way when Kouga had to be in the real world without Muramasa's spirit standing at his side. Muramasa did not seem to like his father-in-law, and he couldn't say that he blamed the whispering zanpaktou at all. Right now, as he saw the senkaimon opening, he was not very fond of his father-in-law at all.

He turned to accept the traveling pack that the unseated shinigami held out to him, and when he turned back around to face the senkaimon he met Ginrei's cold stare head on.

"Kouga."

Kouga noticed how different his name sounded when it was spat out of Ginrei's mouth like that, compared to the other night when Muramasa had said it like a silent chant, a gateway to a meditative state, a road to an enlightenment from the perspective of the whisperer.

He forced himself to answer. "Ginrei-dono."

Ginrei expressed no emotion in either direction towards Kouga's response. "It is time. You will not be able to return to Soul Society until ten years from now. That is when you will turn in your full report and wait for further consideration about your role here."

He nodded. "How will I know when I am allowed to return?"

"We will pick a landmark within Hueco Mundo that is easily viewable from any distance and send out a flare. Also..." The older man paused, reaching in his pocket for a glass ball with a counter in it.

"A gift from my daughter, though I do not know why it was made for you. This will turn completely cloudy when your ten years are finished. It's fed by reiatsu, so it won't go anywhere once it's held by you."

The words had all the warmth and softness of winter snow and sandpaper tangled together. Kouga expected nothing different from his father-in-law. He said meaningless words of gratitude and accepted the gift, feeling it turn warm as he touched it.

"Goodbye, Ginrei-dono."

"Be well, Kouga."

There was nothing more to say.

* * *

Nakamura Mizuki was not pleased with this inner world. Why did she have to have the weird inner world, with the even weirder zanpaktou living in it? She didn't want green valleys; she wanted snow. She didn't want trees that looked so lush and full of life.

Maybe if her inner world wasn't so bright and cheery, she'd be able to handle everything that happened. Like having to stay a 7th seat when weaklings were promoted above her at every turn.

_I guess that's what happened when you tried to speak out against the elite. _

She hadn't expected anyone to really believe that Ochi Kunitake had been anything but a sweet, dear boy from the Ochi minor nobility set. He was careful to wait until she graduated from the Academy to make his intentions known, obviously used to getting his way in everything that he wanted. When she rejected him, she never expected anger — when did she ever experience anger? Her family wasn't wealthy, but they enjoyed a quiet life in the First District of Rukongai — there wasn't any anger around her as a child.

Her hand went to her cheek, still feeling the lines of the deep scar there from Kunitake's zanpaktou. It had been healed by the best private healers family money could buy, but she still felt it on the inside.

It had changed her, changed her soul inside and out. She even noticed changes in her powers. At first, her power seemed to run more towards the flowing water side, the way her teachers expected. After that...incident, she didn't know what to think of her skills anymore.

Anger from being held back by the old noble's club she couldn't ever hope to be part of, while Kunitake was groomed for a supposed Central 46 position no one was supposed to know about.

If she ever got the chance, he and all of the men he called on to help him keep her helpless, exposed, and fearful ...they'd burn.

"Mistress! I need to talk to you!"

She stiffened. She didn't want to talk to this odd zanpaktou; she didn't want to _accept _that this was her zanpaktou now. The extra power wasn't helpful when the spirit never seemed to accept her or care about her. That wasn't right at all — her academy professors waxed on poetically and nostalgically about their deep connection to their zanpaktou, yet Mizuki never could say that she had that type of bond with Rosen Saira.

_Barahime_, she corrected herself. That's the correct name for my weapon. That other name was too foreign on her lips and it made her feel awkward just thinking about it.

"_Barahime_."

Saira appeared in front of Mizuki, sighing softly. "I wish we could make amends, Mizuki."

"You don't get to be so damned familiar with me! What do you want now?"

Saira waved a hand. She was still in the white robes with the detailed purple trim in the center, trying to think of anything except for Muramasa's departure. She could feel the distance between them grow until it was nearly too much to bear. Now she had to deal with the mistress.

"Mistress. I was hoping we could sit for tea, and that we could try to get to know each other again."

"The only thing you need to know...is that I'll grind you under my feet!"

She charged at the dark haired spirit, hating every inch of her. That dark curly hair, so different from her long stick-straight brown hair, those dark eyes, so different from her dark green-brown ones, the strange clothes that seemed from a world away from hers.

Her moves with the katana were decent, but they were no match for Saira's speed of defense. The two women moved into the air, a sharp wind picking up in the valley.

"Why do such things when I want to help you, walk with you, and grow with you? So that we'll get strong together?"

"I DON'T NEED YOUR HELP!" Mizuki raised her sword above her head. "Adjust, Barahime!"

Her sword dissolved slowly into a cloud of thorns, twirling on air. Her shaky hand moved the small cloud at Saira, trying to hit her.

This is what happened the last time they sparred — she struggled with controlling the movements necessarily to defeat her opponent.

Saira shrugged and sighed sadly. "As you like, mistress._ Adjust_."

Her twin steel staves appeared in view and a wave of the hand brought them spinning quickly at Mizuki.

_It's like my weapon...but two heavy objects instead of this little cloud of small thorns..._ Mizuki didn't have time to think before those spinning staves came at her. She managed to dodge one and felt pretty smug for a few seconds until its twin slammed into her from the side.

Saira watched her mistress struggle and ached for the young girl. She knew where the icy attitude stemmed from but now wasn't the time for hugs and soft words. She needed to go full out with the mistress and keep trying to encourage her to listen. For Muramasa and Kouga, she owed them this much.

Mizuki felt Saira fade away as she rolled off her feet and began to fall through the air. She felt the spirit catch her, holding her gently as they stood on air.

"I don't need your pity!"

"I don't need your rage. You want to be angry at someone, do it elsewhere."

"Why won't you lend me your powers so I can strike them all down?"

"You are not subtle. You would die. Hence, I would die. Why would I advocate our deaths?"

Mizuki squirmed, trying to break free of this woman. She wouldn't start crying, wouldn't start trying to be understanding and kind when she wanted to still tear flesh from bone. The realization that her powers in this current state would not let her do such things filled her with hatred.

"I hate everything about you."

Saira smiled and steadied Mizuki on her feet. "That's okay. I have learned that love and hate are merely exaggerated extremes of each other. One can be reversed into the other with time. Let's start there."

Mizuki blinked, hearing something that sounded like kindness in the words.

A few white wildflowers danced with the wind, and her dark brownish-green eyes locked with Saira's inky-brown ones. Sparks of understanding were beginning to form.

Unfortunately, acceptance wasn't fully there yet.

* * *

Kouga shivered. He had a traveling cloak on and his shihakusho closed up, yet the biting wind of Hueco still seemed to dig into him all the same. He had burst into Hueco Mundo near a cluster of rocks that looked it formed an eerie, elongated grin. He figured this would be the type of place they would use to come fetch him when they felt like caring about him again.

He slipped into soldier mode, looking around at his surroundings. The first step to his new home would be to setting up a proper camp. He didn't really want to sleep on the ground exposed to the elements, so he hoped to find some sort of cave.

The winds were alternating between picking up and fading away, and it scraped over Kouga's nerves. Damn this cold! This is definitely not Sereitei...

Sereitei. Part of him wanted that word to fall from his lips like a curse, but the other part reminded him that was still home. It was still where he had watched over his division, it was still where he had met his wife, and it was where he had first learned to whisper, wasn't it?

"You seem troubled."

Muramasa appeared rapidly as if summoned by his very thoughts. The slight grin that followed indicated this was more the case than the spirit would admit.

Kouga nodded, secretly happy for some company. "I was wondering when you'd appear. You seem...different."

Muramasa looked at him for a moment, and shrugged. "Some spirits do better or worse based on environment. Some glow in Sereitei, whereas others thrive more in a place with a lot of concentrated reishi such as Hueco Mundo. I suppose I'm in the latter category."

There was a slight shift and Kouga felt those nails lash out for him, shoving him out of the way as a flying hollow began to swoop down at them. The katana was already in hand as the spirit swooped up to fight it off, waiting until it had landed to deliver a deep slashing blow that turned the hollow into a heap of dust.

Kouga had rolled into the sand, watching Muramasa view the surroundings with a lethal gleam in those normally serene sky blue eyes that concerned him. He moved to his feet quickly, readjusting the pack on his back. "Uh..thanks."

"No need to thank me...Kouga. This is what I'm here to do."

Muramasa sounded odd, and it left Kouga feeling odd. Was the spirit getting tired of him? He was in a new place, trying to find shelter and feeling more than a bit weak that it was taking too much time to get his bearings.

Kouga reached out to Muramasa and felt relieved when the spirit pressed a hand to his shoulder. Those nails grazed him slightly, and left in their place memories of the night they shared together before leaving Sereitei for good.

The way his name had been savored, honored, recited over and over...a chant that had led them to fall to sweet oblivion together...

He focused harder on the surroundings and noticed a dark path ahead that led to a cluster of caves.

They walked to the caves together, with Muramasa daring to slip his pale thin hand into Kouga's strong and thick counterpart. For now, it would be enough.

* * *

Kouga sat and studied the walls of the cave that was a lot warmer than the outside. He noticed that it was actually a network of large caves that went deeper, but this was one that only seemed to branch out in a few directions. The caves had strange warmth that was still unexplained. It wasn't the same warm breeze he had grown to enjoy in both Sereitei and within his inner world, but it was enough to take the biting cold away and replace it with something decently tolerable.

He had a few blankets packed up, along with a few things to keep himself decently cleaned up. Maintaining hygiene was the only small speck of vanity that he'd allow himself to ever have, so he enjoyed what he could.

Muramasa was staring at the deep, dark hallway that led to the rest of the cave network. "We should be fine to sleep here for now, since we can see clearly if anyone comes near us."

Kouga raised an eyebrow. "You're going to sleep?"

Muramasa sighed. "I don't need sleep often, but sleeping more helps me stay out in this form longer without draining your reiatsu as heavily. Did you check your counter?"

Kouga pulled out the glass ball and noticed it was warm to the touch, just like his icy father-in-law said it would be. He saw it was clear straight through, with only a slight hint of cloudiness to come. He felt a strange tugging at his inner barriers, as if there was a message waiting there.

Muramasa looked up. Sky blue eyes turned light purple in a flash of a moment, and then returned back to their normal color. "It's fine. It's a message from the giver of the gift."

Kouga furrowed his brows together. What did his wife have to say that wasn't said in the day they had spent together before he left? He had done everything a noblewoman's husband was supposed to do, say everything a noblewoman's husband was supposed to say. He made sure not to embarrass himself or say something that was out of place. So what was really behind this little message?

Only one way to find out.

He closed his eyes and allowed that tugging feeling to have access to his mind. He saw the message slowly come to life and he listened as his wife's voice flowed over his senses.

_Kouga, _

_If you're listening to this, then I have succeeded. I want you to know that I am upset about this departure. I couldn't tell you out loud for the same reasons you cannot tell me what's truly troubling you. _

_I know what is being said about you — but I also know that you are a strong and brave man who cares deeply for the peace of his homeland. You will never do anything that threatens that peace, I just know it. _

_My dear husband, you must be careful in this ten year period. Please think on whatever it is that is going on that's causing you to stand taller than the rest. While the sight of you growing into such a tall and beautiful nail is delightful to me as your wife; I also know the fate of such a nail will not be pleasant. _

_Sending all of my love and good feeling from now till when you return, _

_Your faithful wife._

The voice faded away and he opened his eyes to find Muramasa watching him with a light smile.

He waved Muramasa forward, thanking him for giving him the privacy to sort out the message with a light kiss on his lips. He wrapped his arms around the thin spirit carefully, noticing for the first time how frail the form felt against him.

"Sorry I've been a little distant. I...it's taking me a while to get used to everything. Being away...from everyone."

Muramasa felt those lips pull away and he stayed close to his shinigami. He had a feeling there would be swirling waves waiting for him when he finally returned to the inner world.

_Do not forget, Muramasa...sanctuary. _

He would build a sanctuary on the inside for Kouga, one that would last for the ages. Something the exotic woman said underneath the words told him that he would need it.

Kouga smiled, truly smiled for the first time he left Soul Society. It was a freeing experience to be able to talk, laugh, smile and really think without the rules of Soul Society bearing down on him.

"Is your friend all right?"

Muramasa shrugged. "I have not spoken to Rosen Saira yet."

"What's with you two?"

Muramasa rolled his eyes, a surprising movement that Kouga found adorable because it was so out of character for his usually stoic and scowling zanpaktou. "I told you. She has her uses."

"You were gone for a long time with her — surely she means more than that?"

Another shrug and sigh. "I wouldn't know what to do with her, really. We're...different. Very different."

Kouga ran his hands through the messy brown locks, trying to make small talk. "I would accept it if...if you wanted to spent time with her more."

"Oh?"

Kouga nodded, closing his eyes and breathing in Muramasa's scent. It was a comforting feeling that he could actually physically feel Muramasa in his arms.

_Interesting, he seems so awkward in this world, whereas in the inner world he is at the top of his game. Why is that?_

He gently rubbed the thin shoulders through the white coat. "You're not even cold."

Muramasa chuckled. "Haven't you noticed that my skin is always cold anyway? Cold weather does not bother me." He angled his body to look Kouga in the eyes. "Besides, I'd walk through any weather if it meant getting to be by your side, or to serve your agenda."

They shared another kiss, with Kouga tilting Muramasa's face up to meet his. His hand cupped the small chin carefully as his tongue snuck out to explore Muramasa's mouth again. The hidden heat he found there was nice.

He broke off the kiss, noticing a surprised look on the whisperer's face. "We have ten years. I plan on enjoying them with you — you wanted me to get stronger, and I certainly will. We certainly will. However, I want to take some things slow too. We've been...consumed by passion lately...I need to know you in other ways too."

The reddish tinge on Muramasa's cheeks was a sight that Kouga deeply enjoyed — it looked so erotic and adorable at the same time. "...master with the sword, master with the pen." Muramasa kept his deep husky tones as playful as possible, but he wanted to admit openly the third piece of the previous repetition: master with the whispering spirit's heart too, whether Muramasa liked it or not.

Kouga reached for the blankets, a perfect distraction Muramasa could latch onto to distract himself from his thoughts. They moved against the wall in a more prone position, snuggling up to each other. This was something Kouga dreamed of being able to do but couldn't ask for such a thing in Soul Society.

If this was the way things would be for ten years...he could live with that.

* * *

Muramasa opened his eyes and enjoyed the familiar surroundings of his inner world. He sat on the edge of the pillar, seeing things begin to click into place. There was danger in the Soul Society, dangerous voices that were beginning to cry to the Captain Commander that Kouga be silenced. This felt more like a rehearsal for that moment than anything else, almost as if they were testing to see how they could get on without his shinigami.

I cannot lose him. I cannot lose him. I cannot lose him.

He felt the water pick up below him and he briefly felt that old fear of drowning creep up on him. Even more reason to build sanctuary, even more reason to curl tighter around his Kouga. If he could give his life over to making Kouga as happy as possible, it would mean that he could avoid drowning in those dark seas.

He was beginning to believe that Rosen Saira was actually telling him to build an actual sanctuary here. There were still questions on how to begin, but he figured he should start with the foundation and attempt to get the structure filled in.

_Land. _

He breathed, drawing on all of his spirit pressure to merge a cluster of pillars together into a large rectangular plot of hard land. It was a decent size, not as large as the Kuchiki mansion by any means, but he figured a Captain-level shinigami would have been pleased with the space. He figured it best to start with a large space rather than try to figure out how to shrink it down. He wanted Kouga to be as comfortable as possible, and have space to move around. He thought about a small back in the back where he could sit and watch the waves, and added more pillar blocks to expand the plot of "land" further.

He repeated the process for the front, his thoughts silently taking him back to the colorful wildflowers of the valley. It would be lovely if he could bring that type of color and life to Kouga as well. He would think more on it and see what he could do. This was still his inner world and he just needed to be able to focus.

The coin on a string vibrated and hummed, almost as if there was approval to be given for the work done so far.

A sharp pain ran through Muramasa, causing him to double over and clutch his chest. It was a sign he had exerted too much, too soon. He brought his long nails up to wipe away those bloody tears that came along with the other signs of overexertion. He wanted to build as quickly as possible, but he was indeed the extension of a shinigami warrior. He knew all too well that winning the war was a matter of surviving and conservation of strength more than almost anything else.

For Kouga's sake, he would win this war and give them the sanctuary they both needed. _There was no other choice._

* * *

**AN: That's a good place to end this chapter — I don't want to rush through the Ten Years of Solitude arc. I apologize up front if Hueco Mundo seems a bit out of sorts — since the Kouga / Muramasa storyline is set hundreds of years before our main Bleach storyline, I figured there really wouldn't be anything of note in Hueco Mundo — or is there? *dun dun dun***

**The fun of this story is that so much is unexplained from the manga/anime with this world so I get to pretty much create whatever I want. The 'sanctuary' stuff is starting to become literal, isn't it? :) After talking with my awesomesauce beta, I decided to start a little foreshadowing.**

**Peals of Laughter, I'm totally looking at you when I say this — this is definitely going to stay a 'nice' story. Yes, there will be chapters ahead that I'm sure will put our two darlings in quite the bind — but they'll go through hell together. ;)**

**This is a little shorter than 'Decadence', which makes me feel like quite the perv. It's their first day in HM - they're tired from traveling and wandering around to find sanctuary in the desert. There's a several hour gap between when they land and when they find the cave, just to give you an idea of the timing.**

**I took a little artistic license with the glass ball, because I couldn't think of a way for them to honestly tell when to come back without something like that. I didn't want a hidden 'Soul Society monitors them from afar' thing — you'll see why in a few chapters.**

**Heads up - this will probably be a *lengthy* arc. I feel this is probably the heart of 'Sanctuary', and everything afterward will be the falling action of the story & the conclusion - The Pillars series is NOT over after Sanctuary - I'm just starting the next piece of the series right after this. I actually have part of it written. Yes, I'm obsessed.**

**I'm debating whether or not to start using titles. They're probably going to take away my copywriter's badge for saying this, but I suck at titles. Really. (semi-inside joke - most copywriting starts with an attention-getting headline - get it? ;D)**

**A couple of songs I had on while I was writing this chapter: Ginuwine's "Differences", and Marc Broussard's "The Beauty of Who You Are". I also had M.I.A's "Paper Planes" on for the Ginrei / Kouga scene in the beginning, but don't ask me how that's relevant.**

**I really couldn't continue writing this without the support of so many writer goodies — Midnight Marquis, Kurogawa Yumi, Peals-of-Laughter, Avaritia Kuroneko, renjisaseximofo, VAMPIRELG and QueenHappo have all contributed their thoughts in one way or another, and it's really helping me get "comfortable" to write both fics.**

**Even though Pealsy is IMPATIENT. You're getting TWO updates, woman. You better love me! *stomps foot***

**Watch: she's going to scream for the first Hueco Mundo lemon. I just know it. :)**

**I'm teasing of course. I'm looking forward to the next time I can update 'Decadence' ...there's plenty of creativity to be had in Hueco Mundo, you know...*grins***

**As always, your alerts, faves, reviews and VIEWS are much appreciated. I'm deeply honored and moved, and can't wait for the next time I get to share with you.**

**Going to sleep now. :)  
**


	6. Ten Years of Seclusion: Part Two

**Pillars of Sanctuary, a KougaxMuramasa fic**

**Disclaimer: Bleach is not mine.**

**AN: OK - 'Sanctuary' is in the place to be. We pick up a year into the Ten Years of Seclusion arc in _lovely_ Hueco Mundo. Aren't political games fun? Right. So... not too much to say on this note. Full braindump notes on the bottom. Kouga & Muramasa are talking first in the physical world (Hueco Mundo) and then in the inner world. Mostly inner world space for the moment. We'll return back to the real world in the next chapter of Sanctuary.  
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**Warnings: Yaoi, implied past sexual escapades, slight foul language here and there. Keeping it light over here, folks.  
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**_Italics_ denote thoughts and past references/scenes. **

* * *

Although a year had passed since he had been shoved into Hueco Mundo, Kouga was still filled with great anger over the situation. The days were filled with walking through the caves, and the nights were spent wondering if he ever really would be allowed back to his homeland. While it had its problems, he couldn't deny the fact that it was still home and this endless desert certainly was not. What made the last year bearable was having Muramasa at his side. Once he established he could use the company, Muramasa had slowly begun to open up and actually talk a lot more than in the past. It was interesting to see what these spirits had their own set of issues and concerns, just like their respective shinigami.

There was one subject Muramasa wasn't keen on discussing, and it was centered on the spirit woman who smelled like roses. He had caught the barest hint of the fragrance on Muramasa's collar and was curious about her. I wonder what happened between them to make him so hesitant on saying anything about her to me.

He didn't care to pry — Muramasa told him about so much as it was, so he figured he could allow the spirit to at least have a few secrets.

Kouga stepped out of his thoughts and looked around for the whispering spirit he had grown so fond of. Where did he go? He figured he should check the inner world — Muramasa did have to return here occasionally to recharge so he could keep walking around the physical world. That was what he told Kouga; though the shinigami had a feeling that he didn't really have to go back as often as Muramasa claimed. _It's been a while since I've been in there myself — time to go pay him a visit._

Kouga had gotten rather good at slipping in and out of his inner world since he began really speaking to Muramasa. The sight of an endless world of pillars and ocean was soothing. He felt a warm breeze and sighed happily. _Why couldn't the rest of the world be this peaceful? _

As Kouga looked around the inner world, he didn't notice Muramasa standing at their usual large pillar. He decided not to let panic overwhelm him, even though that was the more tempting option at the moment. He sensed the spirit in this world, but it seemed so far away.

He turned and began to hop from pillar to pillar, focusing on the tiny thread of reiatsu that felt so weak compared to his own. What had the spirit been doing that drained him so much?

It felt like forever before he reached that last pillar, and landed on a large rectangular space. It was something that startled him, as his eyes focused on the scene before him. There was a large structure in front of him, reminding him more of the quarters his Captain had occupied in Soul Society than the Kuchiki mansion. It looked to be two stories tall and fairly wide, since he couldn't see around the house at all.

He couldn't see inside due to the screens drawn over the windows, but it didn't matter. He was beyond impressed with the structure, completely taken aback that Muramasa would stop to create such a beautiful thing for him.

As he got closer to the doorstep, he noticed Muramasa curled up on the steps, with a look on his face that said more about his current state of exhaustion than he would ever admit to Kouga directly. The pale skin seemed even paler and there were two thick red streaks that had dried on his face.

Kouga scooped the slender spirit into his arms carefully, and decided to step through the doorway properly.

* * *

When Muramasa woke up, he was lying quietly on a mattress pad and covered with a blanket. His head ached and throbbed and he noticed he was inside the sanctuary he built for Kouga. His eyes fell on Kouga, noticing his shinigami was kneeling next to him with his eyes closed.

"You didn't have to go to so much trouble."

Kouga chuckled quietly, reaching out to sweep back a few dark brown locks from Muramasa's forehead. _Idiot. He spends time doing __**this**__ for me and yet thinks that __**I'm**__ the one going to extremes? _

"It wasn't trouble...you didn't have to do this..."

Muramasa scowled, turning his head slightly. "Yes, I did."

Kouga felt a sharp twinge of concern over Muramasa's reaction. What did the whisperer see that he didn't? Was he preparing for something?

"Why?"

"It was explained to me that everyone...everyone should have a sanctuary. So I wanted to do this for you."

That explained why he was often gone when Kouga woke up, which required Kouga summoning him back to his side. That explained that tired, exhausted look in those sky blue eyes when the spirit finally materialized in the real world.

Since his skills with a sword were not his only area of expertise, Kouga realized that there was something else that was being left unsaid. He lightly touched Muramasa's thin hand, noticing for the first time truly how long those nails really went. "Who told you that?"

"Rosen Saira did. She worries...because of what was being done in the shadows about you."

The bitterness in Muramasa's voice finally broke Kouga's patience. "Why are you upset with her? Did something happened I didn't know about?"

He wasn't prepared for that eerie look in Muramasa's eyes as they focused on him with more intensity than his sickly complexion should have been able to bear. "We have...disagreements, that's all. Our focus and beliefs are different."

"And that causes you to distrust her?"

"She has a different dynamic with her shinigami than I do."

_A different dynamic? What did that mean?_ Kouga tried to gently caress the slender hands that had crafted such an interesting structure. "What does that mean, Muramasa?"

A quiet sigh pierced through the light pause. "Simple. I don't have any other purpose than making sure you are safe, content, and happy. When you're happy - this world is warm and peaceful, and the water...stays where it needs to stay. It doesn't try to rise up and drown me. You are strong and beautiful — I could not ask for a better shinigami to grow with and serve for as long as I am able to do so."

Muramasa coughed slightly and waved Kouga off when he pressed closer. "It is fine — I'm just a little more tired than I expected to be." He continued on, lightly holding Kouga's hand as he spoke. "Rosen Saira, on the other hand, has a very broken tie to her shinigami. She only assists Nakamura Mizuki when it's absolutely necessary so that she doesn't perish. I don't approve of such a disconnection between those two."

Kouga took in the words and smiled brightly at Muramasa. "I still can't believe you did this for me."

_Is it so hard to believe that I would do anything to keep him safe? _

The spirit nodded quietly, and tried to get settled in. He was exhausted and tired, but he couldn't afford to not be at his best for Kouga. "My power is always for you, first and foremost. Everything else is an afterthought. Everything else is a far distant second."

"Are you always this passionate about me?"

Muramasa watched Kouga really looking at him with those apple green eyes that pierced through his defenses so skillfully. _I am just doing what a zanpaktou does for their shinigami and nothing more._

If he felt better, he would have openly laughed at himself. He wanted to cling to that ideal because any alternative was something he wasn't sure he wanted to deal with. He didn't want to see a relationship because he worried about being abandoned and cast aside. _If I just appear as a loyal servant, then I can't get hurt either way._

"I am just doing what I believe is right for you, Kouga. I do serve, you know."

Kouga chewed on the words, and then chewed on the words underneath words that weren't being said. Was his whispering spirit dealing with the same issues he was? He wanted to lose himself in these moments, to connect with this slender and mysterious man in a way he hadn't been able to connect to anyone else.

He was torn. Was this because they were both trapped in Hueco Mundo together? He knew that when people were thrown into awkward situations, they adapted in order to make themselves as comfortable as possible. This didn't have that same feel.

_He was always like this with me. Let me do whatever I wanted with him. To him. No complaints, ever. Does he really care, or am I thinking too much? _

Kouga moved to lay close to Muramasa and wrapped an arm around him tightly. "To be so forward-thinking, sometimes you say the most asinine things, Muramasa." He brought his free hand up to thread lightly through those messy brown locks and sighed. "We're lying to ourselves and to each other if we think this is ...normal behavior. We're clearly a bit more interested in each other than that."

"What do you want?"

Anything. Everything. You. Kouga paused before making his reply. "I want to be happy, I want to get what's been taken from me back, with interest. I want to get stronger so that my enemies can't keep cutting me down."

Muramasa didn't say anything, noticing what wasn't included in that list. "I see."

There was a sudden stiffness in the slender man's movements that startled Kouga. _What did I say?_

"That's not all I want though. Not anymore. I want you too, I just ...I'm just not good at this sort of thing."

Muramasa eased back into Kouga's embrace and nodded. "Neither am I."

Kouga laughed. "You? You are so responsive, kind, friendly. You're the one with all the experience."

Muramasa turned slowly to face Kouga, looking him in the eyes as he waved a clawed hand. "Experience? Kouga, my primary experiences in life revolve around controlling life, taking life, and moving things around to further your agenda. I would hardly call those experiences relevant to ...to this."

He brushed his lips over Kouga's lightly, sighing softly before breaking away. They would have to leave soon and he would need to slide into a sleeping pattern in order to speed up the healing process.

That sickly look to Muramasa's features made Kouga ache. "You need rest."

Muramasa shook his head. "I'll be fine. We should get back."

Kouga pressed him back into place on the bedding. "You say you want to take care of me, right? Well, you can't do that if you aren't in good shape yourself. Take advantage of sanctuary for yourself, too."

Muramasa closed his eyes again, those sweeps of Kouga's fingers through his hair lulling him into a sleep he desperately needed.

Kouga hummed and thought about sleep himself. It would let him wake up more refreshed and ready to seize the day no matter what it held.

_No, Muramasa, __**you**__ are the one that does not need to worry. __**I **__am here. _

* * *

Mizuki slipped into her inner world with a sigh. All people could talk about, even a year later, was that stupid Kuchiki man. Who really cared where the noble got shipped off to? Hueco Mundo wasn't punishment enough, but Mizuki was surprised Kuchiki Kouga got any punishment at all. Weren't those nobles above the law as they loved to believe?

She automatically wrapped her arms around her slender frame and hummed. It was cold in here! Her eyes focused on the light snow that was falling, as well as the woman in the distance that was watching the leaves fall from the trees.

Mizuki walked through the valley noticing the light layer of snow on the ground. Snow. Real snow just for her? Impossible.

She noticed a change in her zanpaktou over the last year. Instead of being bright and bubbly, the spirit had grown quiet and slightly chilly. Their conversations revolved around the basics: training, getting stronger, and more training. It was like she stopped trying to get to know Mizuki altogether.

_Fine. I don't need her anyway. _

Her kido was okay, though not remarkable. Her hand to hand was weak and her swordsmanship was average. She had to be honest with herself — what helped her win a lot of fights was simply her small size and speed. She had to get better if she was going to make sure she came out of everything on top.

What could possibly be buzzing through that strange woman's head today? Mizuki had a feeling it had a lot to do with that man she thought she heard. The voice seemed so strange — deep and husky yet it held so much authority in it. It couldn't have been an enemy; otherwise it wouldn't have been able to come here.

There was no use for men. None at all. In addition, what did a zanpaktou spirit need a man for anyway? They couldn't do anything extraordinary. Perhaps she just imagined there was a man here.

_No. I heard __**her**__. I heard __**him**__. I heard them__** together**__ - how __disgusting__. _

If it was another spirit, that meant that it had a shinigami that controlled it. She didn't know all of the shinigami outside of her division, but it had to belong to a pretty powerful shinigami to come here. There weren't that many that could just walk through inner worlds.

Mizuki felt really afraid for a moment as her mind worked out the possibilities. Didn't that Kuchiki man that got thrown out of Hueco Mundo have a zanpaktou that could control others? She thought it was the most demonic thing she ever heard of in her life. A zanpaktou that could turn on its own meant a zanpaktou that had far too much power to be trusted. If Barahime was even remotely connected to that demon blade Mizuki would tear them apart.

_Nothing that came from a noble was ever a good thing. This proves it loud and clear. _

"Mistress?"

Mizuki looked up and noticed Barahime standing in front of her, those large dark brown eyes the only expressive part of her face. The expressionless mask startled Mizuki for a moment. "There was a man here." she said absentmindedly, still halfway lost in her thoughts.

"A man?"

Rage began to bubble up in Mizuki and she grabbed part of Barahime's thick robes. "Don't play dumb with me! I know what you did! You're worse than the whores in the lowest pit of Rukongai!"

"Rage does not look good on you, Mizuki."

"You don't get to be familiar with me."

"I forget, Nakamura-san."

"We aren't equals. Ever. Maybe you've forgotten who rules here."

Saira ignored the angry words of her mistress. It must be a hard life when you can never truly gain closure for the crimes of others against your soul. "Look, mistress. It is snowing here."

Mizuki did notice the snow starting to fall faster, but there was still too much green. There was still too much life here where it should be stripped and barren. Why didn't this woman look hollow and empty? If they were really the same soul, shouldn't Barahime ache as much as she did? How could she let the demon touch her so intimately when such things only led to pain, agony, and defeat?

"It needs to have more snow. Less green. I hate it."

Saira nodded and reached out to embrace Mizuki. "Less green will not make you feel better."

"Shut up."

"I can only imagine..."

"WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT ANYTHING?" Mizuki shoved her elbow into Barahime's side, knocking her off her feet and onto the cold ground. She snarled and stepped on the spirit woman's chest. "You're a damn zanpaktou! Your job is to make me powerful and that's it! Admit it - that demon's been here."

"Muramasa is not a demon!"

"SILENCE! He belongs to a noble — nothing good ever comes from them."

"I would have saved you."

Mizuki blinked. "What did you just say?"

Saira looked up into the thin woman's eyes, into hazel eyes that looked absolutely agitated that they had to even look back at her. "I said...I would have saved you. Nakamura-san, we don't speak. You never reached out to me. You told me you didn't need me...so I shut myself away so I wouldn't disturb you. I didn't want you angry with me."

"I finally called you out!"

"We were already too far apart to hear each other!" Saira was back on her feet, with more than a little anger coating her voice. "Do you think I enjoyed watching us fall apart? You changed. I changed. I couldn't be a flowing water type after everything I had seen...you changed me, Nakamura-san. You did this to me. You had suffered so much damage that your mind rearranged everything into a form you could handle."

Mizuki looked at the spirit distrustfully, trying to hold onto something like anger and only coming up with a feeling of loneliness and fatigue. As much as she wanted to tear the spirit woman apart, she knew that it wasn't an option. She had to get stronger to be able to keep going forward. The best way to do that, would be to get Saira on her side and try to get along.

Finally, she breathed deeply and exhaled. "You made it snow...for me?"

A slight nod from the spirit confirmed what she suspected and it made her feel guilty. Guilty for all of their fights, for all of the times she provoked the spirit into defense mode. No matter how angry Mizuki got, her rose princess would cut her down.

"Thank you...Rosen Saira."

Mizuki fell back against the spirit, sighing softly as Saira held her tightly. "Nakamura-san."

It was a start. That was all they could ask for.

* * *

They were both 7th seats, but as Mizuki charged her, the other shinigami realized Nakamura-san really had more power than that.

"What's wrong? I thought you said we could practice!" Mizuki kept moving, thinking about the conversation she had with Rosen Saira earlier. She agreed that she would try to patch the relationship and connected they had. However, she did not agree that she wouldn't do everything in her power to bring the noble and his demon zanpaktou down.

They can't be trusted, my princess. None of them.

Mizuki realized that Rosen Saira would never really understand that, nor would the spirit woman be able to truly ally herself with Mizuki for this common purpose.

_She's been tainted by lies, false promises, and the flesh. They've spoiled her. _

The other 7th seat noticed how distracted Mizuki looked, as if she were seeing something far away from here. "Nakamura-san?"

Mizuki looked up and bowed slightly. "Please forgive me. I must have lost my concentration. Would it be all right if we paused for now?"

Once she received an agreeable answer, she bowed again and ran off the practice grounds as fast as she could. A quick mental tally told her she had nine years to get ready for those twin demons to come back to Soul Society. She would get rid of them both and rescue Saira. Once she was free of those demons, her rose princess would be completely able to help them both rise higher and higher.

Muramasa, I will never forgive you for taking what belongs to me. I will never forget what you stole from me, you demon.

* * *

**AN: I wanted a partial resolution between Mizuki and Saira without her having the same dynamic Kouga and Muramasa do. I also can't help putting a little manipulation into this fic, and it's so awful because I love it so gosh darn much! It's a little shorter than what I had originally planned. I wanted to do a scene after the practice sparring round but my brain thought of that ending line and I didn't want anything else taking away from it!**

**I'm taking a lot of Mizuki's current conflict and emotional state from collective journals, diaries, and group sessions of women I've counseled for abuse in the past. Coming from a broken and abusive home myself, I understand the *disconnect* that can arise between what we perceive and the reality of things. I didn't want to make it too stylized and over the top, yet I didn't want Mizuki to just hug Saira and accept everything happening either. I hope I've struck some sort of balance between the two. Given the way Mizuki feels toward Muramasa, I didn't want Saira to introduce the 'wildflower' code to her.**

**Can a story based on filler have filler chapters? LOL. I wanted to post this to connect a few things before JT and I really dig into the Ten Years of Seclusion arc.**

**The more I look at this story, I see it as a large 'what if' puzzle opening up. I just finished watching ep 252 and I can't help but wonder how things would be different if Kouga and Muramasa were 1) connected from the beginning 2) trusting each other 3) learned how to work together. That's the angle from where 'Pillars' comes from. I had a LONG conversation with my beta about this fic, since it is diverging from the filler arc so much. His response was pretty much a 'have fun and stop worrying so much', which is what I expect from JT. We write fanfic for the thrill of telling a story. I know AU isn't everyone's cup of tea though, and sometimes that does color how I tell a story. Right now, just about every story in my account deviates from canon in some way. It gets to me I guess because I know AU can go either way. I am having a blast telling my 'what if' story ... and I'm far from finished with the series as a whole. I have already seen the end of Sanctuary, but ...remember we have 9 years in Hueco Mundo, plus a few events in Soul Society to go through before the end comes. If you've already watched & re-watched 250 & 251, you know some of those events do indeed have to come to Sanctuary — it'll be an interesting twist to see what happens compared to the anime. ;) That's all I'll say on that.**

**I see Pillars as a whole following the AU trend, since I just don't have a way of telling this story in the way it's intended unless I play with the storyline a bit. My goal is to keep both of them as IC as I can — well, aside from my tweaks and the addition of the OC's. I still see Kouga's pride and inner conflict here, as well as Muramasa's loyalty and conflicts. Based on your reviews, it seems like everyone's pretty OK with this essentially becoming AU.**

**That reminds me — remember that Kouga and Muramasa's Hueco Mundo is several hundred years before Aizen's — therefore, there's no Las Noches to speak of. I *think* Barragan is around somewhere, but I don't have a precise date on that. It hurts my brain to think that hard about it - I have to assume that the arrancar may or may not be there. I'm just going to set up Hueco Mundo at this point and see where we go.**

**One year has passed in Hueco Mundo. Nine left to go. I wanted to introduce the sanctuary concept at the beginning of the arc and go from there instead of leaving it as a surprise for the end of the arc. Given the name of the fic, it'll play a pretty serious role as the events during and after this arc take shape.**

**Is Mizuki the great villain of the story? No, absolutely not. I do see her doing everything she can to cause K&M's downfall based on her perception. Her perception of reality may or may not change, but this is what she's seeing at this point in time. A lot can happen in nine years.**

**Since the inner world is a network of continuous perceptions, I kept part of the house's description a little hazy. I looked at several types of Japanese houses — I'm still not sure what would fit best. That "land" the house is sitting on is large enough to accommodate quite a structure. I sense that the 'house' will change as Kouga's perception changes.**

**Yes, I know I announced I'm supposed to be on hiatus. I am. I am. I am. ;) I had a lucky break in my schedule - client allowed a reschedule which freed up some time. I decided to let the muse wander for a moment.**

**I hope the sensitive souls aren't crying too much. No matter what happens, remember this is a K&M story that will eventually have a good ending. I just might have to tug on your heartstrings to get there.**

**I am filled with gratitude for everyone that's been following along with this story. I do have to hat-tip Juno Tartini again for pointing out the error in Chapter 5. I went back and re-watched most of the Zanpaktou Rebellion arc -- I just realized there's little purple cuffs on the end of Muramasa's coat. Yes, I'm that finicky that I got irritated I didn't detail that in my fic. I am noticing in some eps Mura's eyes are sky blue-y, and in others it's turquoise. I'm going to leave them sky blue because I can do that. :) **

**Your alerts, faves, reviews, PMs, and overall support is what's gotten us through 6 chapters. The next leg of the TYoS arc is being co-written by JT - we're creating our own spin on Hueco Mundo (need some conflict in here!) as well as our spin on the events *after* the HM saga is over. This is going to be so much fun. **

**I'm...60% through 'Decadence', which I only put here because I know some of the Sanctuary readers are also Decadence readers. :) I will still keep both sides of the story separate, the more I think about it. I really do try to put equal effort into both stories and I love 'Sanctuary' just as much as I love Decadence. They're honestly both difficult to write -- the lemon side doesn't make itself easy for me...because I still want to match the exploration and depth that I see in Sanctuary. Sigh. **

**JT is also helping me round out our OC cast -- I don't want Saira to turn into an overpowering character at all, but she is important. I don't know if I need to add AU & OC to the warning list - I'll go ahead and add it to this chapter & the next ones from here on out. **

**Sorry these are so lengthy on the bottom. If you reached the end, a shiny internet cookie for you! :D**


	7. Ten Years of Seclusion: Part Three

**Pillars of Sanctuary, a KougaxMuramasa fic**

**Disclaimer: Bleach is not mine. **

**AN: I was inspired. We're well into the 2****nd**** year of the Ten Years of Seclusion arc. Biggest milestone has been the creation of the 'sanctuary of the mind' by Muramasa for Kouga's sake (Chapter 6). Relationship wise, they're still having some struggles & concerns, but that's to be expected. **

**Warnings: minor mentions of violence, character distress, yaoi, OC's, AU **

**Chapter 7: Ten Years of Seclusion: Part Three**

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* * *

  
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"I cannot believe you waited two years to finally talk to me!"

Muramasa sighed. This was not the start to his morning that he had been hoping for. It was nearing the end of their second year in Hueco Mundo, and they had been busy. Kouga wanted to map as much of Hueco Mundo as possible, and had brought a large amount of paper and ink to do so. While Kouga was mapping, he wanted as much peace as possible so it gave him some time to himself. Disturbing Kouga was something that just wasn't acceptable.

He had decided to stay in the physical world close by, yet far away enough that he wouldn't disturb Kouga while he was trying to concentrate. He had much preferred to speak to Saira in the privacy of his inner world, but he had to make do with what the conditions of life were at the moment.

"My apologies, Rosen Saira. It's been...a rather hectic two years."

"Hectic?" There was a soft pause of concern hanging in their communication thread.

He sighed before continuing. "It's pretty desolate out here. We're sticking to the cave system here unless we really need to go above the surface for one of our mapping expeditions. There's an interesting underground of life here."

"Oh? I bet your first love really likes that."

Two years of seclusion hadn't formed a barrier that irritation couldn't smash through. _She doesn't need to be so jealous continuously. _

"No need to be that way."

"You've had all this time to make eyes at your precious shinigami, Mura-chan. I guess you forgot about me after...after..."

Muramasa cut her off. "Our final moments were special to me, but as I have discussed with you before, my main priority is and always will be Kouga."

"How silly of me to imagine it could be anything different."

"That doesn't mean you aren't important, Saira..."

"I don't need you to pretend I matter, Muramasa. I..."

Muramasa waited for her to continue, and then filled in the silence. "I have no need of false pretenses with you. What's the real reason why you're so upset, Saira?"

"Mizuki...she knows. About..us, and Kouga."

"Mizuki?"

"Nakamura Mizuki, my shinigami. 7th seat."

"Oh."

Muramasa studied the information carefully. Nakamura Mizuki wasn't someone he was familiar with — he vaguely remembered the shinigami, but even at her power level she wasn't a match for Kouga's strength. He didn't like the hesitant and fearful tone in Saira's voice. _What happened in two years to make such a willful spirit sound so broken?_

"Be careful...you know I have my issues with your first love, Muramasa...but take care of him, and yourself too."

"He's my shinigami, not my first love. Stop calling him that."

"Oh, how precious! But Mura-chan, denial doesn't look good on you. You love him. You really do. I just hope, for your sake, you realize that before it's too late."

_Muramasa. _

Muramasa looked down at the area where Kouga was seated and sighed. Duty called, always. "Saira, I have to go."

He wasn't surprised when the communication line went immediately dead. _If denial doesn't look good on me, then jealousy certainly doesn't look good on you, Rosen Saira..._

He couldn't think long on that, disappearing and reappearing by Kouga's side. "Yes?"

Kouga was already cleaned up and toying with the ends of his long scarf. "I just wanted you near me."

The words felt warm, and it made Muramasa curve his lips into a smile he saved only for Kouga. "I see."

Kouga studied the spirit for a moment, unable to forget the bit of conversation between Muramasa and the other spirit. _My main priority is and always will be Kouga._ It made him feel good to know that Muramasa was so devoted to him, but there was also a strange sense of confusion.

_He never told her he loves me - I guess he really don't think about me like that._

He had put away the mapping equipment, frustrated with the fact he had the task to begin with. It was a useless assignment, given the fact that Soul Society didn't really care much about Hueco Mundo at the moment. They were more than happy to let the Hollow stay there, only moving forward when there were Hollow sightings in the human world or in Soul Society proper.

_Forgotten, ignored, secluded._ Those were the words that came to mind when he thought of Hueco Mundo, but he noticed how well the series of words fit his current situation. He was forgotten about, secluded away from the world, and his achievements simply ignored. He had given everything for them - his power, his body, his spirit - without any complaint. This was apparently their reward for anyone that dared to be powerful while they were trying to save the land they truly loved.

_No more. I will not let them get me here, even now. _

He was just about to turn to get closer to the whisperer when a loud Hollow roar rang through the cave. It was followed by a sharp cry and footsteps coming their way.

"Muramasa, stay in the sword for now."

There wasn't any time to think of a counterargument, and that steel undercurrent that flowed through Kouga's voice made it clear this was not the time to argue. He faded away, leaving Kouga to charge forward.

The Hollow was massive, taking up almost the entire height of the cave. It was chasing a small hollow that looked strangely human. It resembled a small boy, with a large bone mask fragment curling around both of his ears like horns.

"C'mere! I'm bigger than you and that means you're breakfast!"

"Noooooo please don't eat me!"

Kouga hesitated for a split second. This was a struggle between two Hollows, which did not concern him. He was a shinigami, and whichever Hollow survived would fall to his sword anyway. That would have been his attitude if he hadn't been discarded and thrown away, given as much concern as one would give to a worn out calligraphy brush. Two years ago his decision would be clear — things were far different now.

He rushed forward, pouring reiatsu into his blade, sweeping upward to land a deep slash right to the center of the Hollow's head. The element of surprise had worked well in his favor. What he didn't notice was the long tail that had swept behind him, filled with sharp barbs long the length. Before he finished the cutting motion, that tail slammed into his side, with those thick barbs piercing his skin.

"Oh no, mister...you got hit!" the boyish Hollow had crawled closer to him, his bright blue eyes narrowing in concern for his rescuer.

"Muramasa..." Kouga was trying to concentrate, trying to make sense of things around him. The cave seemed to be fading in and out of his vision, followed by a feeling of being pinned down by an invisible weight.

"Kouga!" Muramasa reappeared, catching Kouga as he fell unconscious. His eyes were frosted with concern for his shinigami, noticing the tightening of Kouga's facial features.

The small Hollow frowned sadly. "I'm sorry, this is all my fault! He saved me and..."

Muramasa cut him off. "Has he been poisoned?"

The little Hollow nodded, trying to hold back his tears. "It was a surface Hollow that got down here... some of them carry poisons...we have to get him back...maybe my lady can heal him."

Muramasa nodded and scooped Kouga up into his arms, looking at the small Hollow. "I don't have any choice but to trust you. I will not hesitate to defend him if you're leading him into a trap."

"No trap, sir. I promise."

The spirit looked down at the unconscious Kouga and sighed deeply. He would give anything for those apple green eyes to snap open and reassure him that everything would be alright.

_I cannot lose him. I cannot lose him. I cannot lose him. _

* * *

Saira sighed as she shuffled through the snow. Snow fell all the time now, covering the once-green valley in a constant haze of snow and ice. The animals that she had once fed and petted when things were a vibrant green either passed on or stayed hidden. Her beautiful clusters of wildflowers were all gone, buried under the snow.

_How does Muramasa do this? He thinks nothing of just doing whatever Kouga wants him to. Why can't I follow his lead? _

It made her unhappy to be in this cold world now, and even though Mizuki's visits increased since the inner world was turned more to her liking, she still wasn't kind to Saira at all.

Today, it was the fact that there were still animals living in the inner world. She wanted nothing but snow and clouds. Upon looking at Saira's shocked face, she came to a compromise of allowing the trees to stay, as long as no new growth was displayed on them.

The small structure that she had built under the trees several years ago also had to go. "Why do you need sanctuary? You're a damn spirit. You have me. I should be everything you need, Barahime."

She nodded, nodded along as she usually did when the mistress went on her tangents. With a sigh, she faded the structure away, trying not to think about the memories she held there. She wanted to reach out to Muramasa again, like she did this morning, but it was too dangerous to get caught speaking to him.

_The mistress might think she's too clever to be caught, but she's mistaken. I know she doesn't like Muramasa at all. _

The coin on a string in her sleeve vibrated with a strange intensity. She sensed a strong rush of despair out there with Muramasa, which increased her worries and fears. _The way he rushed off earlier...did something happen to Kouga? _She felt a strange sense of panic and distress on the other side of that link, but she couldn't pursue it. She closed the link fully, so that Mizuki wouldn't catch on. That would be the last thing either of them really needed.

_Fight well, Muramasa. Fight well._

* * *

Muramasa noticed the flurry of activity as he carried Kouga, following the rushed steps of the small Hollow boy.

"Please summon the lady and her healers!" Muramasa noted how loud the little boy's voice carried compared to his small size.

A gruff voice replied, and a tall thin man appeared. He also had the same fragmented mask as the little boy, except his formed a shape that looked like a sleeping cap. "And why should we...Sorgi? Is that you?"

The young boy nodded. "That man saved my life, Emil! One of the Surface Ones got down here and he killed it."

"He's a shinigami. What stopped him from attacking you?"

It was a question the little boy could only shrug to. "I...do not know, sir. But I don't want him to die because of his kindness."

"Fine. I will bring her and I will let her know..."

Muramasa noticed a tall woman dressed in simple blue robes appear behind the one called Emil. "There is no need to bring me, or let me know anything. Emil, I am surprised that you would break my rules and ignore a sick man. Regardless of his association."

As she came towards Muramasa, he cringed instinctively, holding Kouga tighter to him. The woman smiled politely. "You impress me by protecting him, but I must heal him quickly. We are running out of time." She turned on her heel and began to walk off to another dark opening, with two assistants following her.

_I have no choice but to follow and trust. Hang on, Kouga! _

—-

The only things that Kouga could hear were voices, coiling all around him.

"He took a lot of poison, lady!"

"Surprised a little shinigami took out a Surface One all by himself."

"Sorgi wouldn't lie — but why would a shinigami defend a Hollow?"

"No idea."

"Look, he's got a pretty thing in his hair — it looks like he's important."

"Tsch. All shinigami think they're important, Deera."

"Emil, what's your problem?"

"He's a shinigami, Deera. Just because the lady is wasting her energy..."

There was a sharp silence that interrupted the dialogue, leaving Kouga even more confused. Where was he? All he remembered was fighting a giant Hollow and then falling towards Muramasa. _Where was Muramasa, anyway?_

"Muramasa..."

A soft voice embraced his thoughts calmly. "You must be talking about the man that carried you here. I had to separate him from you. He was very distraught and it was distracting me from healing you."

He nodded, slowly opening his eyes. He found himself looking at a tall woman in blue robes, with the remnants of a Hollow mask around her right eye like a giant fan. He stiffened immediately. _Hollow_.

Yet there was something different about this Hollow. Her mask didn't cover her entire face, nor did she look monstrous. Aside from the hands that held long fingernails, she looked nearly as human as he did. There were blue stars under her left eye, and a blue diagonal mark across her right cheek.

The woman smiled as he studied her. "You have many questions, shinigami. I understand. However, before you react...I mean you no harm. Your partner brought you here so I could remove the poison in your body."

"Poison?"

"You killed a Surface One. Some of them carry poison that they release as they feel themselves getting close to death. You took in a lot of poison. I had to draw it out of you...your friend did not like this."

He looked down at his uniform, noticing how it was neatly put back in place. He blushed deeply, a sigh that made the woman laugh. "I apologize for invading your privacy - I felt it was more important to keep you from dying than for you to hold on to modesty. Your friend was very much against exposing you."

"Where is Muramasa?"

"He is being held under a light guard, for his protection."

"Protection?"

Her left eye narrowed as she looked at him. "As I healed you, I realized that he is a spirit that has its roots in you. How interesting that he seems to move so independently of you. He carried you here, but he collapsed earlier out of exhaustion. I had him healed by one of my assistants while you slept. He is very protective of you, shinigami."

Kouga nodded and tried to sit up more, but the movement was painful. The woman gently pushed him back down on the bed. "Please rest. If it would make you more comfortable to see your friend, I will have him brought to you."

"May I ask your name, healer?"

The woman nodded. "I'm Cortine Marleera. And you, shinigami?"

"Kouga...Kuchiki Kouga." It felt odd to call himself part of the Kuchiki house, especially after how coldly he was treated by Ginrei earlier. However, it was the only foundation he had to go on, so he continued on.

Marleera watched him for a few more moments, then snapped her fingers.

"Yes, lady?"

Kouga watched the woman smile at the assistant for a moment. "Please bring the one that brought the shinigami here. Thank you."

Kouga knew a dismissal when he heard it, and so did the assistant. There was no reply except for a quick bow. When she flashed away, Kouga raised an eyebrow.

"Shinigami are not the only ones that know how to move quickly. You call it shunpo, yes?"

"How did you know that?"

"You may not understand us, but we have a full understanding of you - for the most part."

"Yes, it's called shunpo. What do you call it?"

Marleera grinned. "_Sonido_."

Kouga was almost certain she was going to demonstrate, but she refrained. "We have a lot to learn from each other, Kuchiki Kouga. For now, rest. I will have your friend brought to you soon. May I ask you something, Kuchiki-san?"

He nodded, stretching slightly. "I'm in no position to deny you much."

"What is your relationship to the spirit, really? He seems very attached to you."

_My main priority is and always will be Kouga. _

_**Don't** call him my first love. _

Kouga didn't know what to call his connection to Muramasa anymore. He thought quietly of their moments over the last two years. Does that mean I'm in love with him? Does that mean he's in love with me?

"I don't really know, to be honest."

Marleera smiled. "If I were you, Kuchiki-san, I would figure it out while you still have the time to do so. Life is short, even for a shinigami."

She apparently wasn't waiting for a reply, moving instead to step outside.

"Kouga?" Muramasa walked in slowly, taking careful steps. The floor wasn't completely smooth, and became a bit of a challenge for Muramasa's heeled boots.

"I'm here...are you okay?"

Muramasa's eyes had an eerie look to them that Kouga couldn't decipher. "I should be asking you if you're alright. Why did you do that, Kouga?"

"I...don't know."

"We have to get out of here. They're Hollows, even though they claim they don't mean us any harm...we can't stay here."

"Agreed. Yet...I don't think we can just get away so easily. I don't want to invite trouble. We are outnumbered."

Kouga closed his eyes as Muramasa moved to run a chilly hand over his arms and shoulders. His eyes snapped open wide as Muramasa leaned in closer for a deep kiss, his eyes half-closing. "You scared me. I was afraid I was going to lose you."

_I don't deserve that much concern. I'm nobody special. Yet I can't help but feel...something inside when he says stuff like that. _

"Thank you for your concern."

"You know I'm always here for you, Kouga."

_**But you don't love me**__. You're just saying what I expect to hear from my zanpaktou. I guess that's good...for now. Maybe...maybe you'll care for me more than that. Someday. _

Muramasa sighed softly, keeping Kouga close to him. He hadn't expected anything special from that desperate kiss, but he ached for something _more_.

_I wish he noticed me, I wish he noticed the way I care about him. I think I really am in love with Kuchiki Kouga. Strange, I don't feel like that's a bad thing at all. _

* * *

**AN: Wha? An update for 'Sanctuary' so soon? Say it ain't so! I'm sort of having fun with the 'does he really love me' double-confusion between these two. I feel at this point they're both wondering if what they're feeling between them is something real or just generated from their seclusion. **

**I see both of their perspectives through this. I really want to see them both recognize how much the other means to them... we'll see ;) **

**Hat-tipping my beta for exploring the AU world with me & shaping Hueco Mundo. He had an idea for the 'natural' arrancar, a subculture of Hollow that exist underground in the cave system Kouga and Muramasa have been exploring. They're background characters for the Ten Years of Seclusion arc, but their influence will be felt in the Pillars stories to come. My beta wanted conflict, while I wanted something sweet. So I decided to come up with this as a middle ground & JT felt it fit. **

**I fangirl'ed a little at the idea of Muramasa carrying Kouga. If he can control other zan's, I assume he's strong enough to carry Kouga bridal-style ;) **

**I think this is the point of no return for AUness, since my Hueco Mundo is so different. **

**Right now, the Natural arrancar cast: **

**Cortine Marleera - the leader of the Naturals. At this point, we know she is a healer and that she has healed Kouga. The method of healing has not yet been revealed. **

**Emil - a dissenter, anti-shinigami but underneath Marleera's command**

**Sorgi - the young Hollow boy that Kouga saved.**

**Deera - another arrancar, distrustful but not as outrightly so as Emil**

**I'm still trying to stick to Asian-style naming — Last, First — even though the name itself might not be Asian at all. The Naturals will likely have names from all over the place, to reflect their mis-mash status. Also, since I don't know the timeline proper for the story (the filler says this all happens hundreds of years earlier ...) I assume that Kouga has no information on what _we_ know as the Arrancar in current-Bleach storyline (hence his shock about sonido). I hope that clears that up. Next chapter will go into more detail, I just needed to set it up from this point  
**

**I felt like creating some Saira-angst. It happens. My beta and I agree that really no good is going to come Saira's way at *all*. It amuses me that everytime I create an OC, bad stuff happens. I don't know if it's just my way of avoiding Mary-Sueism. **

**In order to get the greater plot of Pillars handled, I will have to use more OC's than I've ever used for a story. I don't want them to take over the story - but right now, I figure that OC'ism is necessary as a backdrop for the Ten Years arc. **

**I'll still have to sit and chat with the betafish on what else we'll do in the Ten Years arc. **

**If you're following timeline for timeline's sake, this is nearing the end of the *second* year. The next chapter will walk through the last few months of the second year. I'll try to keep up with the timeline. **

**JT-the-beta suggested not being so strict with the years - if the story skips from the 3rd to the 6th year, and it makes sense, run with it. Or if there's something important during a week within the 4th year, storytell about it. I'll try to always let you know what year we're in. **

**We're a long way from the finish of Sanctuary in either case. **

**I'm taking Kurogawa Yumi's advice and just enjoying the process of writing the story. I tend to automatically get annoyed with myself with each chapter because I'm moving so far outside the normal storyverse pattern. A lot of this story is highly interpretative, but you know what? I think that's part of the fun. **

**I'm going to try to keep updating - I do have to work on some updates for Moonbathing. As far as Decadence, I may end up publishing two chapters for it, because it's bugging me that Decadence is technically a chapter behind Sanctuary. I'd prefer for the stories to have the same # of chapters if I can help it. Yes, weird I know. **

**As always, I appreciate your comments, reviews, PMs, faves, alerts and views! I couldn't get to Chapter 7 without you guys! :) *leaves more Muramasa cookies* **

**Don't tempt me. I just might try to make those someday. *is a sad addicted fangirl* **


	8. Ten Years of Seclusion: Part Four

**Pillars of Sanctuary, a KougaxMuramasa fic**

**Disclaimer: Bleach is not mine. **

**Author's Note: Very fluff chapter. Can a story based on a filler arc have filler? Apparently so - I wanted to do an update to take my mind off of work (I'm not a very happy copywriter right now, so send some positive vibes for me.) **

**If you were wincing at the angst, you'll enjoy the fluff. I promise. **

**Warnings: Yaoi, *maybe* yuri if you squint hard enough, slight mentions of previous abuse (non graphic), um...that's it. This is the T story, so no lemon. There is the obvious implied smexual relationship between K&M. (just a head's up for people who are diving into this chap w/o reading the others...) Full author's notes are always at the bottom if you care to dig into my thoughts around the chap afterward ;) **

**Storytime. In. The. House!**

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* * *

  
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The poison has left his system, but Kouga feels like he's still stuck in that odd dance between life and death. He aches from head to toe, and he knows from his experience as a shinigami that he still has a few days before he'll really feel like his old self. He thinks about the way things have been so far, and his feelings are mixed. The anger of being cast aside like a set of table scraps still burns within him, but he is no longer completely filled with rage. After all, being sent to Hueco Mundo has opened his mind up to a few new possibilities.

_Muramasa_. The whispering spirit was really at the heart of him being pulled out of death's clutches. As a shinigami, he's not really afraid of his own death but that does not mean that he wants to actually die. He heard the arrancar mention that his spirit partner carried him into this place and defended him viciously; even when the healer had to strip him down to carry out her work.

_"You know I'm always here for you, Kouga."_

_"Don't call him my first love." _

_How strange, the way those two statements conflict with each other._ Kouga can't recall ever really feeling like he was good at loving anyone or receiving love. While he wasn't a noble, he didn't grow up in a dysfunctional family — there was care, concern and understanding but he wasn't sure if those issues equaled love at all. He wanted to believe in love, wanted to believe in its healing power but he didn't know if he ever really felt it in his life. On the battlefield, strong emotion of any kind was more likely to leave you literally in pieces.

Yet in these thoughts, he can't help but remember the numerous times Muramasa has comforted him. He can't help but remember the way those sky blue eyes have held so much understanding, even when Kouga was blistering with rage. Even the day they were cast into Hueco Mundo, Muramasa was there for him, carefully reassuring and soothing him from within that world of pillars and oceans.

_Sanctuary._ He can't reflect on his whispering, wandering zanpaktou without thinking about the grand structure the spirit has constructed for him. He imagines that it has taken more energy to create than Muramasa will ever let on. They have comforted each other in that place many times and it truly has become a real home away from home for him. Whenever he is stressed and needs to get away from this constant night scene, he steps into the inner world.

He still can't manifest things as well as Muramasa does, which is why he lets the spirit make the bed and tidy things up. To give him some sort of semblance of his real home, his bright eyed partner even combs his hair and washes it, even though Kouga is well aware these things are mere tricks on the mind. He is not really home, and while finding the underground lakes has been a real blessing — it strongly pales in comparison to his accommodations back in the Sereitei.

_Does he really feel anything for me? More importantly, what can I do for him in the long run? _

_"Don't call him my first love." _

That statement keeps ricocheting around in his mind, and he can't help but feel hurt by the words he wasn't supposed to overhear. If Muramasa was really in love with Saira, he could accept that — they were two spirits, it made sense. He wouldn't get in the way of such a thing, would even track down who the spirit belonged to in order to arrange more time for their respective zanpaktou to meet. He didn't really understand much about Muramasa's world and he noticed the spirit didn't volunteer a whole lot of information. He hoped that their seclusion would open Muramasa up a bit more, but he was disappointed to find the spirit still preferred his mysterious, secretive ways.

"I walk, control, and take, Kouga. Isn't that what you wished for in your heart as we trained together, soldier to soldier?"

_I walk, control, and __**take**__. _

_I'm going to devour you, Kouga. I'm going to consume you; I'm going to inhale you. Kouga, I'm going to absorb you. Learn to enjoy it. _

He remembers those things being said but it was in a different place, with Muramasa indulging his curiosity. He could tell the spirit was not happy about doing such a thing, but he couldn't bear to stop such a delicious scene from its natural completion. It was odd to not be in control, since he knew he was in control all the time.

_Follow your instincts, Kouga. _

What were his instincts when it came to love? Running. It pricked at his pride as a Kuchiki to realize that whenever emotions got involved, it made him feel like running. It made him feel like hiding until the emotional storm had passed, and that never led to any victory on any battlefield he had experience in.

Yet facing this challenge seemed impossible. He was afraid of being rejected by the spirit, of misinterpreting the actions that seemed so kind and loving yet were really just the mannerisms of a good and loyal servant.

_Is that all this is? If so, why am I aching in ways I know the hollow didn't cause? _

He wants to face the spirit right now, to look into those sky blue eyes and pray for the understanding he admittedly takes for granted to be there in spades. However, he seems to be gone.

A short sweep of his inner world comes up empty. The little trick is something he could only pick up here in Hueco Mundo after Muramasa's gentle prodding and assistance. It doesn't do him any real good, since Muramasa isn't here.

"Muramasa..."

As expected, Muramasa appears before him, giving him a slight bow before turning to look him in the eye. "Kouga. Good evening."

He chuckles softly, noticing the spirit has remembered their running joke. It is always night in Hueco Mundo, so the spirit always says good evening. Kouga doesn't mind the extra words, since gives him two extra opportunities to hear that deep husky voice slide over his ears like silk over a katana, or the way those long fingernails dance over his back when they're behind closed doors.

Like now, except for the fact he feels like he's been steam-pressed by five thousand Hollow.

Muramasa watches his shinigami with a soft smile, a rarity for the world at large yet something that is growing more common between him and the shinigami when they're alone.

_The way those eyes look at me like he's happy to see me fills me with excitement. I don't think I'll ever get enough of the way he looks at me. If only..._

Being the spirit linked to an intelligent man strong enough to gain the attention of the Kuchiki house gave Muramasa a few advantages in terms of strategic thinking. He was not foolish enough to believe that such things as love and affection could exist between a shinigami and the zanpaktou bonded to him.

Yet he is very hopeful that there could be. It's not a fact that he wants to really admit out loud, but wants to know that Kouga seems him as something more.

_If it was the last thing I heard before I lost my life, I would be satisfied. _

"I just needed you near me for a while, Muramasa. Can we talk?"

"Of course." Muramasa feels hesitant to respond positively, cringing at the possibility of something negative coming from his shinigami. He has acted far out of character compared to his movements in the Sereitei, and he can already imagine Kouga is about to remind him of the lines that stand between them. They cannot be lovers. They cannot be partners. Given Kouga's tendency to adopt the same sternness as the Kuchikis he claims to despise so much, Muramasa doubts that they'll be able to even remain friends. It will be a dynamic of wielder and tool, and nothing more than that.

This realization, as much as it hurts the whispering spirit, does not cause his soft smile to waver or lessen the joy in his eyes as he faces Kouga head on. Whatever the shinigami will say, he will accept. Such is the way of things with the lives they lead.

"Are you happy here? With...me?"

Like the Kuchikis he lives around, Kouga is a master of asking questions within questions. Muramasa has heard him use these tactics on others enough times to learn the pattern and bury its foundation deep within his mind. So he responds accordingly.

"Of course, Kouga."

"I...kami, I don't know how to say this."

Muramasa looks up and sees the blush on Kouga's face, along with his nervousness. _What can he possibly say to me that make him look like this?_

"Follow your instincts, Kouga."

"Come here, then."

He steps forward, trying not to sigh. As much as he enjoys their intimate moments together, he does not want intimacy to simply be a cloak that hides rejection of greater things. He will still give Kouga all he has, publicly and privately, but he does not want any consolation prize for doing so.

Even though this is his thought as he reaches Kouga, those thoughts melt away as Kouga brushes his lips against his in a light kiss that surprises him. The kiss is airy, soft, and surprisingly sweet. He tastes a strange thread of plums and bitter almond on those lips, a taste that is oddly pleasing to him.

Kouga breaks the kiss off and sighs softly. "I'm not good at saying what I feel on the inside. We've been here in Hueco Mundo almost three years now, and I can honestly say ...I couldn't do this without you. I look forward to each new day only because I have you by my side. This road isn't finished - far from it. Yet I don't have the same sense of despair that I had when I first came here. That should be credited to the way you take care of me. I wanted you to know..."

Muramasa reaches out to clutch his hands carefully, making sure the long fingernails don't scratch his flesh. "There is no need to express gratitude, if that is why you summoned me, Kouga. I will always be here for you."

_Even if I believe in the possibility of love, I can't expect him to follow suit. I can deal with loving him without it being returned. I will love him for centuries if it means that his world stays peaceful. _

Kouga furrows his eyebrows together. "Please, let me ...let me finish, Muramasa."

Muramasa goes silent and suppresses a sigh. He knows that it will either be really good or really bad, and he braces himself against either outcome.

"I am blown away by the way you take care of me. You give everything into the task, and before you launch into a lecture to me about shinigami and zanpaktou, you go beyond that role and we both know it. You didn't have to...comfort me that first time, not that way. You don't do it just because I'm distressed...you've grown to enjoy company with me. We have...conversations. I like that." Kouga pauses, taking a breath before continuing.

"Yet there's a sense of not really knowing much about you, or your world. There's a sense that I'm missing something, something greater that requires me to be more trusting than I am now. We are similar, I guess - we like to have control over things. I can't control this in any manner I've been trained in or taught myself. Muramasa, I love you. I can't tell you when, but I know it now. I...I will understand...if you don't. I'll never say it again...but when I was fighting the poison, I realized that I really could fade away any day for any reason. If I passed on to the next cycle with those words in me...the feelings of regret would be so strong that I fear my reincarnated self would still feel them, even if the memories don't carry over."

Kouga wills himself to stop speaking; stop rambling and spewing thoughts that he isn't quite sure make sense. "So...if you don't..."

"Stop that nonsense."

The tone is sharp enough to cut glass and Muramasa breathes in deeply. "Is that why you're looking so nervous? You really think...you really believe that I don't love you? That I would not hesitant to give you everything I have at a moment's notice? Kouga, I understand what you mean about feelings."

A couple of taps with his nails echo around the small space before he continues. "I am not only a zanpaktou, but I am a zanpaktou spirit that controls others of my kind. What do feelings matter when I can simply reach out and take what I want, anytime I want? The only time I don't feel that way...is when you're looking into my eyes. I would gladly give up my life any time for you, and perish completely fulfilled as long as I know that you are safe and can move on. I am not good at feelings at all. Yet I know in my soul that loving you is a good thing. I know that loving you is the right thing to do. And at the core of it all, I know that loving you is the only thing I really can do. I just do not wish to mess it up. I love you, Kuchiki Kouga."

Kouga traps those cool, pale lips in a deep kiss before the startled spirit can actually respond. Several minutes pass before the shinigami breaks the kiss and moves back to study those sky blue eyes more closely.

He loves me. But ...earlier... "Why did you tell her that I was not your first love?"

There's a slight look of irritation that forms into a classic scowl, and Kouga has to fight laughing. That is his scowl, transported onto a face that seems to wear it so well. "Because when Saira says it, she's saying it to hurt me. She knew I was in love with you before I did, and because of that love ...she is aware that I cannot return any real feelings she may have for me."

"Can't you try?"

"Why should I, when I have centuries to be by your side? I do not wish to harm Rosen Saira at all, yet I will not give her false hope of ever being higher in my heart than where you rest."

It is a calculated answer, and Kouga expects nothing less than that. He's satisfied with the answer, since the major battle has already been addressed.

"I see. So where do we go from here?"

The answer he receives next is less complicated: a deep kiss, with those sky blue eyes reminding him that no matter the subject, they will always be filled with an understanding that goes far beyond words.

* * *

_Black sheets form a foundation for a prison that she can't escape from, with sharp bolts of reiatsu delivering the final blow to her freedom. There's too many of them. There's too many of them and too few of her. Her zanpaktou seems far away, as if they live on two different continents. Kido is useless here. _

_"Are you sure no one will come looking for this one?" _

_"She's not like us. She is not from a noble house." _

_"Oh good. Ripe for the taking. I plan to take a great deal." _

She wants the memories to finally fade, the way the markings have thanks to the skillful 4th Division healer that took extra time to make sure the physical pain wouldn't last very long at all. She is glad that the inner world reflects the way she really feels now. There was too much life here before, but now the snowfall is heavier the way it was meant to be.

As she walks through the inner world, she notices something very odd: roses. Roses are scattered everywhere. She can tell that something is making them live through the snowfall, and she has to admit that the design of soft pinks, reds and yellows laced with snow is very pretty.

_I plan to take a great deal. _

_She's not like us. _

_No one will come looking for this one. _

She tries to push those memories back down into the box she has thrown everything else into, tries to remember that she is different now. As she continues to improve her shikai, she will get strong and powerful. Then nothing and no one will ever be able to stop her again.

Roses everywhere. She finally tracks the rose patterns back to the tall spirit of this world, a spirit she doesn't really understand. In her mind, Barahime is tainted by that demon, twisted up into something that will only be used for pain and suffering. The way she was nearly broken apart and destroyed.

When she reaches the spirit, she notices Barahime doing something very odd: building a snowman. A very tall snowman, with long broken branches for arms. The spirit is humming a soft tune and her dark curly hair is laced with snow.

_How can she find peace here when I thought I took all I could away from her? _

"Nakamura-san! Help me put this together!"

Mizuki decides to play along with building the snowman, rolling the various sized snowballs together until they have a rather massive snowman.

"We need a snow female to go with him! Wouldn't that be nice?"

"Why, so she can be at his feet?"

Suddenly, the spirit is right in front of her eyes, mere inches from her face.

"No, so she can be at his side, the way all good partners are. Let me show you the difference."

It is a simple statement that fills Mizuki with hope and cuts through the voices of the past in a way she hasn't been able to really accept before. Her knees buckle for a moment, but the spirit embraces her tightly.

_Why is she holding me like I'm so precious to her? _

"Because the connection between a shinigami and zanpaktou is based on communication and understanding, Nakamura-san. I don't have to hear your thoughts to know you are in great pain today. So I laid a few things here for you."

She points to the snow couple they have built, pointing out the way they're standing side by side. "Sometimes, when your hand is caught in a trap, you have to go to a simpler time to get past the hard times."

Saira watched her shinigami carefully. "I know you and I have a long way to go. It's cold here, and I dislike constantly being surrounded by snow. Because of my ability, the roses will grow just about anywhere. It made me think of you, really."

Her speech is punctuated by a soft kiss to the front of Mizuki's brow before continuing on.

"To the outside world, it looks like you've stopped growing, and in many ways they would be correct. You are so filled with anger, so filled with fear and temper that you are having problems growing into the person you were meant to be. I understand that I am not the flowing water type that you desired. I understand that others mocked you, told you that you were defective and broken when the real truth is you had been hurt beyond belief. I understand, Nakamura-san."

The words are meant to cleanse, but no one ever said that a deep cleanse would not be painful. Mizuki snuggles in closer and sighs. "I expected you to hate me for reacting...to Muramasa..."

"I don't hate you. I understand your perspective to some extent - and within that perspective, you are seeing his worst characteristics."

"He has good ones?"

"He's the one that encouraged me to reach out to you."

"Oh." Mizuki doesn't know what to really say to that. She still doesn't trust the demon zanpaktou, knowing full well that if he wanted to control Barahime more strongly, he could.

"Saira?"

"Nakamura-san?"

"Just call me Mizuki."

"Mizuki-san. What is it?"

"I'm going to ...try to be better. Could you just...hold on to me like this for a little while before I have to go?"

"It would be my pleasure, Mizuki-san."

There were other battles to face, other challenges on the horizon. But for the moment, Saira was certain that this was a good sign of things to come. In her mind, she hoped Muramasa and Kouga were all right.

_Take care of your first love, my whispering friend. Do not wait forever to tell him the lines and valleys of your heart. _

* * *

Kouga leans back in bed, holding a quiet Muramasa in his arms. He is still buzzing with excitement.

_He really loves me. His words earlier were so sincere. I ...don't want this feeling to stop. _

"You are still tired. You will need more rest."

"I'll be okay."

"Oh? Is that why you woke up and did not go back to sleep after realizing I was away?"

"Where did you go?"

A bit of a pause. "Kouga, I will tell you after we've both had some sleep. I learned a few new things about this current world we've been thrust into."

"Oh. I thought..."

"They are Hollow, as much as they would like to present themselves as an advanced tribe. I am still the spirit linked to a shinigami. What would you like me to do?"

"Well...uh..."

Muramasa cut off his rambling statements with another soft kiss. "You are a very stubborn man. Sleep now."

"Stay with me?"

Muramasa smiled and nodded, watching those apple green eyes slowly close. "Do not worry, Kouga. I am here with you." He paused for a moment, remembering their earlier conversation. He added in a lower whisper, just loud enough for his shinigami to hear, "I love you."

There was nothing else to say.

* * *

**AN: I wrote this before bed - I needed some warm and fuzzies after the hard day I had. I'm sorry if they seem a touch OOC with respect to the rest of Pillars. I was re-reading the review from Lanny, and thought, "Why am I torturing these two?" **

**Both sides of the story are getting a "happy" edit for this chapter. I wanted so badly to jump into what Muramasa "learned" while off with the arrancar, but I have to wait for a few more chapters. Hence, filler. Fluff filler. **

**I've tried to go back through this fic and add the italics. I'm starting to like them a great deal. **

**I'm sorry up front for the angst — but c'mon, I'm Marisa Serise. You weren't expecting pure fluff, were you? I might write another fluffy chapter but eh, we'll see. **

**I was totally fangirl'ing during their love-y scene. I needed this chapter after ep 253. That part where Muramasa is really about to become all Hollowfied and he's screaming for Kouga still? Heartbreaking. Even though filler!Kouga is excruciatingly mean and has even been defeated, Muramasa still aches to be close to his shinigami. Aww. **

**I am still trying to weave pieces of the filler arc through Pillars — much of what has been displayed in the filler arc will need to be placed into the *next* installment of Pillars. This is dealing more with a stretching and re-interpretation of the events within 250 & 251. I don't think I will approach 252 & 253, but I can't spill the beans on why. If you're following the story though, you'll notice I've woven their bonds a lot stronger here, which will come into play as some of the more tragic events begin to play out. I still have to deal with the Sealed Kouga Sandwich. We'll see how that plays out. **

**I hope that I didn't make these two too mushy, but I wanted them to get some fluffies. **

**I pulled back a little on the Sai/Miz angst machine - gave them some fluff time too. My beta whined for yuri, but I'm not skilled with the yuri at *all*, and I didn't want to cross into Mary Sue land in the process. I'm personally a Kou/Mura/Sai sandwich shipper, even though I'm not bold enough to write a happy threesome into this. That would be a complicated lemon indeed. **

**Thank y'all so much for your comments, PMs, reviews, views and overall good nature towards my lonely KxM series. I would love for the KxM ship to be MASSIVE the way ByaRen or GinKira are, but that's just me thinking and wishing out loud. **

**Oh, I forgot to touch on the Mizuki thing - those little flashbacks may crop up from time to time. I tried to keep it very light and non-graphic. I warned at the top because I know that it's a serious topic and a trigger for many people that may be reading this fic at any time. Yet without the characterization and the explanation, Mizuki comes off as a flat villain with no spirit. I need balance. **

**Time to get under the covers and dream about more KougaxMuramasa yummies. Yes, I dream in Bleach. What, you don't? **

***lays out more Kouga and Muramasa cookies* I might eat all the Kouga cookies - lord, that man is *fine* (young!Kouga, I mean. crazy!Kouga...I don't know, you can tell he was a hottie back in the day. I would have ridden that little red ponytail all the way down to...uh, what was I saying?) **

**Hoping for more breaths of fresh air so I can write more fanfic, but this is crazy busy season for my copywriter's life apparently. I'll check in when I can, but assume that I am MIA until further notice on my profile. This also means that if I'm following / mini-beta'ing your fic, I might be more out of range than I would like be. **

**That's all! Thanks for reading!**


	9. Ten Years of Seclusion: Part Five

**Pillars of Sanctuary, a KougaxMuramasa fic**

**Disclaimer: Bleach is not mine. Have you **_**seen**_** Ep 255? Do you really think it would have gone down this way? Nooooooooo. ;.; Still love you bunches, Mura-chan! **

**Author's Note: Sorry about lack of updates y'all – I'm wayyyy behind at work and I gotta play catch up for a little bit to make sure our finances are in order. I'll try to squeak in a few more updates this week if I can but aiieee – you know how it goes. **

**I am desperately trying to conclude Year Two – we've been in Y2 for a while now :D We're still in Y2 for right now, but things should start picking up. **

**Warning: Kinda angsty – 'msorry. *mumbles* - added little light touches of fluff here and there but the plot is kinda bitter in a lot of places. Love me anyway, yes-yes? As usual – AU, OC's, speculative fanfic – slight spoilers for those that haven't watched 250-251.**

**I totally fan-love all of you Pillars crew that have been hanging on for nearly nine chapters. 3 I never thought there would be this much love for fillerchars. Ok, I'll stop gushing.  
**

**There are mentions of storyline from another fic connected to the Pillars universe, 'Faux Whispers', but it is not required reading to get this chapter. **

**Storytime in the place to be? You betcha!**

**

* * *

  
**

_He couldn't move._

_He couldn't move._

_He had to. He had to._

_"It's for your own good!"_

_"No! No it's not! I won't let you!"_

_He sensed the distress of his beloved partner, the desperate cries for help that would have been voiced._

_"Muramasa! Help me, Muramasa!"_

_He couldn't move._

_He couldn't move._

_He had to. He __had to._

_There was a pulling sound, and a scream that shattered all the windows in his mind. Kouga! They were locking him away! **No!**_

Muramasa woke up with a start, shaking from head to toe. He was greeted by Kouga leaning over him with a very concerned look on his face.

"Muramasa."

"Kouga...you're safe..."

The slight sneer in the voice that followed made Muramasa feel a little better. "Of course I'm safe. I'm not weak you know." The voice softened as Kouga ran his hand through Muramasa's hair quietly. "You were having a bad dream, it seems. The way you were thrashing around...I woke up but I couldn't wake you...what were you dreaming about?"

_What can I say? I can't tell you what I saw. I can't. I love you too much to even think anymore about the possibility of ever losing you._

Muramasa sighed. "It's nothing, Kouga. You're here, that's all I need right now." He pulled Kouga down for a quick kiss, even though he was well aware that such a term didn't exist for the young shinigami yet. Their relationship was still so new that each kiss seemed to drag on and on, not that Muramasa really minded.

There was a sharp tapping on the door, and Kouga reluctantly rolled off of Muramasa just as Sorgi wandered into the room. He waved politely. "Oh, you're both awake, yay! But why are you so redfaced, Kouga-san? Muramasa-san? Hm...it's kind of like when it's my turn to wake up Marleera-sama and Emi-sama beats me to the punch! They always turn red just like you! Is it something I did?"

Kouga blinked, then chuckled quietly. "Ah...ah...no, I'm sure you're just doing your job. Maybe it's the weather?"

Sorgi mulled over the reply and then shrugged. "Oh well! Doesn't matter I guess - anyway, I wanted to check on you! Muramasa-san went hunting the other day with Emi-sama and the rest of the team, but I know Marleera-sama will want to speak to both of you now. Will you come?"

Muramasa had disappeared and reappeared mere feet from the boy. Sorgi giggled and clapped his hands together. "That's so cool! Can you do it again? What is that?"

"Some other time. We should get going."

Sorgi nodded. "Okay..."

Kouga followed suit, getting up and stretching. He had already had his morning run through the small bath that was tucked into the corner of this room. It was nothing like the area he had at home or even the bathroom that was built in that strange inner world of his, but it did the job for what it was. The water could be warmer, all things considered, but he was in no position to complain.

It was time to face the leader of these Hollow head on. He could do that.

The more he thought about it, with Muramasa at his side, he could do anything.

* * *

The Hell butterfly was beautiful, but it signaled that someone wanted to see her immediately, which was never a good thing. She knew exactly who that someone was this time, since she was still trying to avoid him.

Nakamura Yoshinori.

Nii-sama.

So high above her.

Perfect from every angle.

The only one she couldn't beat in five lifetimes, maybe even _ten_ lifetimes.

She hurried through the walkways of Sereitei, resorting to flash step even though her brother would criticize her on such a thing. She wasn't good enough to be his sister; something that was silently reinforced every time that they were together.

She finally found the Academy's instructor's wing, walking quietly through rows of offices before stopping to kneel in the doorway of her brother's wide open office. The other instructors had much smaller offices but her brother had been a rising star on the staff for a long time, and knew how to command a greater position than he deserved.

It made her _really_ dislike him.

"Nii-sama, I am here."

"Enter, Mizuki."

She quietly moved to her feet and walked in, then dropped back down.

"Nii-sama, I wanted to know —"

"What seat are you now?"

"7th, Nii-sama."

"Oh. Only a 7th seat. Still. You are a Nakamura, you know. Or have you forgotten?"

"No, Nii-sama! I mean...definitely not, Nii-sama. I will strive to move higher...it's just..you know..."

"I am aware of the incident you are referring to. Is that your admission of not being able to handle life as a shinigami? Do I need to have you moved out into the administrative staff here?"

Life as a paper pusher was not what Mizuki wanted at all. There was no glory there, no way of really distinguishing yourself. She might as well paint herself with invisible ink and get the same effect.

"I will get stronger, Yoshinori-sama. I promise."

"See that you do. I had Matsumori Yuudai ask me why you have not progressed as much. Have you mended ways with your zanpaktou?"

"I was not aware that I had an issue with my zanpaktou, Nii-sama."

"No sass from you! If you are not getting stronger, there is clearly a reason! You may win sympathy from everyone else, but _I_ will _not_ pity you. You will get stronger and continue to rise above all expectation. Is that clear?"

"Yes, Nii-sama. Forgive me."

"Dismissed."

She realized as she slowly rose to her feet that he never once looked at her. In fact, their entire conversation had been carried out in mere minutes with his back to her the entire time.

As she left the room and covered her pain with flash steps, it fully hit her that not only had he had his back to her, he didn't even turn to notice she had entered the room.

_One day, Nii-sama, you're going to have no choice but to turn. I will make you see me clearly._

* * *

Kouga studied the woman that was sitting on a large stone chair. He vaguely recognized the dark blue robes and remembered this was the woman that healed him. He was feeling better but the memory of how close he came to death frightened him.

"Good day, Kouga-san. Are you feeling well?"

He nodded and the woman smiled. "Excellent. I am so glad. We have been keeping an eye on your recovery for the last few weeks..."

Kouga blinked. He was out of commission for weeks and not days? He wouldn't really know since he was underground and had no way to really tell time other than his reiatsu countdown ball.

The woman leaned back carefully and sighed. "I can tell that you're still hesitant to be here, yet if you are so worried...why don't we simply send you back?"

"Send me back?"

"To Soul Society."

Kouga shivered. Even if they _could_ do that...he was well aware that there would be several punishments launched his way if he returned early.

"There is no need. I am on a mission here."

"You mean you have been kindly shown the door?"

Confusion flickered over Kouga's features. How did...

Marleera chuckled. "It's quite obvious to me that this 'mission' you speak of is not done from your own free will. I have my own theory on why, but tell me - what happened to make them turn against one of their own?"

_One of their own. _

Kouga thought for a moment. Was he really one of the shinigami still? He had laid down everything he was to serve their principles - and would do so again, if given the chance. Yet this very meeting was a complete mockery of everything he was raised to believe in. He was taught that these were the enemy, that the only thing a Hollow deserved was a deep slash down the center of the head. Even though their masks were cracked and partially removed, they were still Hollow. He was a shinigami.

Something told him not everything was so black and white as this. This woman healed him when she could have easily let him die. He also realized that if he had died, Muramasa would have disappeared with him. They were connected, and Kouga realized that he did not like the idea of the whispering spirit paying such a high price for a mistake he had nothing to do with.

Kouga vaguely remembered being lifted up and carried in the slender spirit's arms. He would never doubt the strength of the spirit ever again - he was aware that he had to have been a heavy load but there was no hesitation in those movements.

_One of their own. _

He didn't think he could honestly say that anymore. So he spoke the truth.

"We were sent out of Soul Society because of the nature of my power. Soul Society feels it is too dangerous."

A thin smile graced Marleera's lips. "Oh?"

Kouga nodded, pointing at Muramasa. "He's my zanpaktou."

The man next to the woman grunted. "That's bullshit. I've never seen a damn zanpaktou materialize like that before and speak independently! Lying ass shinigami..."

"Emi. That is enough, darling. Our shinigami friend is speaking the truth. That _is_ a spirit."

The man was about to open his mouth again until he noticed the slim fingers curling into a fist. He dipped his head slightly. "My apologies, Cortine-sama."

If the shift in formality was accepted, it wasn't readily expressed. Instead, Marleera continued. "He disappears and reappears in order to refresh his energy. Also, there are not two different reiatsu signatures between them. While the spirit's reiatsu signature is slightly different, there is not enough of a difference to truly say they are two separate entities."

The woman turned to Kouga again. "What is this power that has Soul Society so ruffled?"

Kouga sighed, dreading this question but unable to steer away from the truth. "Muramasa's special ability is to take control of other zanpaktou. He appeals to their deepest desires and encourages them to rebel against their shinigami."

Marleera nodded. "I would imagine that would be quite...startling for the upper crust of Soul Society to handle. That does not affect me in the slightest."

Kouga noticed the man called Emi grunt again. "Hell yeah - let me have a go at the shinigami, Cortine-sama. If they're supposed to explore the world of Hueco Mundo, we can't send 'em home without a good show!"

"No."

"No?"

"Correct, Emi. Let Deera take up the challenge. That is, if Kouga-san is agreeable?"

Kouga was curious to figure out why this Marleera woman was so convinced that his abilities would be useless against her group. He figured that if he could figure it out he could only get stronger.

A shorter woman in dark brown hakama got up, the wide sleeves of her white top partially trailing behind her. She bowed respectfully to Kouga, stepping back to place her hand quietly on her sword. Kouga noticed that like the others, she only had mere fragments of her Hollow mask left. The top of her uniform was parted slightly to reveal part of her Hollow hole and a pretty good view of her cleavage to boot.

"Aw, if you beat me, Kuchiki-san, I'll let you stare at my chest all you like. Until then... Cortine-sama, where should we go?"

"Down to the pit. I'll light the area."

Kouga watched Marleera's hands move, unable to take his eyes off the sight. He heard Muramasa murmur to himself, and then disappear. The slight vibration at his side indicated exactly where Muramasa had gone, and he thanked him silently for being so quick.

It is easier for us both if you aren't focused on me during battle. We need to see exactly what these Hollow are capable of.

He nodded and followed the Hollow down to this battle area of theirs, unable to take his hand off his zanpaktou for anything in the world.

As always, Muramasa murmured his reassurances in his mind.

_Do not worry, Kouga. I am here. _

* * *

Saira trudged through the snow, looking for something to pass the time. The small stone on a string buzzed in the inner pocket of her robes, the fifth time today.

_I do not want to bother with __**you**__. Even now._

She decided to answer the call, murmuring to herself. "Yes, Hikaru?"

_**Been a while, Rosen Saira. Are you still waiting on your precious Mura-chan to return to you? **_

"You and I have nothing to say to each other."

_**Oh, you wound me. Is it that you don't know how to deal with a man that can't just tear his way into your inner world? Is **__**that**__** what you're into?**_

"Be quiet, now. You're only trying to upset me."

_**Maybe. Maybe not. **_

"No more games. What do you want?"

_**You. **_

Saira sighed, expecting that type of answer. The three of them had a long history together. There was a time where Hikaru, Muramasa and she were very close, but in an awkward way. She was aware there was an informal triangle of interest brewing between all of them. Hikaru never really forgave her for encouraging Muramasa to finally let Kouga know how he really felt. If she had stayed out of the way, perhaps Hikaru and Muramasa would have been able to carry on a relationship.

_**You forget that I made the decision to protect your heart too, Hikaru. As long as Kouga is in the picture, Muramasa can't see anything else. He just **__**can't**__**.**_

"You can't use me to change the way the situation has to be right now."

_**We could take care of each other quite nicely. After all, Muramasa left you here, all alone. I sense it's cold there. Why is it cold, Sai-chan?**_

"The mistress wants it that way."

_**My, my, times have changed. Mm. I've always wanted to know what cold is like. **_

"Who said you were coming over?"

_You know you want me there. They aren't going to be back for ten years, Sai-chan. Not to mention you have no reason to be...faithful at all. _

The words were correct but they still filled Saira with worry and panic. She didn't want to invite him here, really. Even though many years had passed between that early informal triangle of interest and now, she still wished things could be different.

"Indeed. But I'm...I don't...want any of that. If you come here, we start over. As friends."

_**Of course. I'm just your friendly neighboring zanpaktou. I'm harmless. **_

Saira snorted. _Hikaru, there are plenty of words to attach to you, but harmless is definitely not one of them. _

She shivered, but it wasn't from the cold or even from the things Hikaru might have up his sleeve. She wanted to see Muramasa, wished desperately that it was him and not Hikaru coming into this new world of snow and ice. She made a quick check to make sure the mistress was still occupied.

She saw Mizuki resting in her quarters, and she breathed in deeply. She would have at least a few hours.

"Fine. Come on in."

* * *

**AN: Whaa, cliffhanger ;.; I wanted to include the full fight scene here but I still need to work out the mechanics. Since this is AU, I want to slowly build up to Muramasa and Kouga's full range of powers. **

**Forgive my Japanese naming - I really liked Yoshinori when I looked up the meaning of the name - I remembered Kouga saying something about Nakamura-san and figured I probably should plug my own plot holes -.- Yes, I'm having Rukia/Byakuya flashes with the whole Nii-sama thing. Meh, for some reason it fit when I wrote it. **

**I'll leave it up to you whether or not Muramasa's abilities will actually work against the arrancar - honestly, from everything I've read - the zanpaktou controlling angle is ineffective given how the Arrancar actually gain their power...**

**Plot. Plot. Plot. :) I'm trying to move the story along, as much as I'm enjoying the Ten Years of Seclusion. It's not all lemons and relationship struggles - I want to also highlight the 'stranger in a strange land' angle of being around the arrancar. **

**Needed some Sorgi :) Aww, so cute! **

**Am I foreshadowing in the opening scene? (Hollow Ichigo voice) Maybe, maybe not. I wanted to play on Muramasa's greatest fear - losing Kouga - without actually going there. I also had to capture Kouga's cockiness (that man is cocky as all get out, but if I had a hax set of powers I'd be cocky too!)**

**A little shorter, but I'm trying to update 4 storyverses in one week ;.; go easy on your fangirl? please? **

**Oh, and Hikaru is an OC zan from 'Faux Whispers', an M-rated story set within the Pillars storyverse, but before Chapter 1 of 'Sanctuary'. I wanted to tie him in and connect the two stories without having to let FW float too long. **

**I still want Kouga and Muramasa to be lovers, but I don't see these two as the true lovey-dovey type. Muramasa knowing instinctively to return to the sword without Kouga saying a word is one of those 'I do it without being told because I love you' moments without being overly mushy. **

**Still trying to weave all the classic Pillars running jokes, gags, and wordflow/wordplay (the triple statements, excessive thought trains, etc) on top of getting us out of Year Two - I'll probably touch on Year Three and then skip ahead to Year Five, skip again to Year Eight, and then cover the Final Year in 3-5 chapters. We'll get back to the Soul Society and the ending after TYoS in roughly 5-7 chapters. **

**I don't want to spoil the ending but all I will say is this: this is a storyverse. Therefore, Sanctuary has an ending, but Kouga and Muramasa do not. :) Make sense? *winks* **

**And yes, Deca is coming. :D It was realllllllly tempting to put a lemony bit in that opening scene but I had to remind myself this isn't Decadence. *is a good girl for now* **

**I know y'all are attached to K & M, and all I can ask is that you continue to trust me. It may get a little bumpy, but I will take care of ya just fine ;) *bakes lots and lots of Kouga and Muramasa cookies* I heart you guys for hanging in there :D**

**Oh yeah. Fanfiction tried to eat it several times - it's 8.44PM now... I've been trying to upload since 5:45pm. *mehmehmeh* - go easy on your fangirl. I'm kinda tired and cranky and FFnet is not helpin'.  
**


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